The Life of Asma bint Abi Bakr (RA) - Dr Ahsan Hanif

Khutbah: The Life of Asma bint Abi Bakr (RA)

إِنَّ الْحَمْدَ لِلَّهِ نَحْمَدُهُ وَنَسْتَعِينُهُ وَنَسْتَغْفِرُهُ وَنَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ مِنْ شُرُورِ أَنْفُسِنَا وَمِنْ سَيِّئَاتِ أَعْمَالِنَا مَنْ يَهْدِهِ اللَّهُ فَلَا مُضِلَّ لَهُ وَمَنْ يُضْلِلْ فَلَا هَادِيَ لَهُ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ نَبِيَّنَا وَسَيِّدَنَا مُحَمَّدًا عَبْدُهُ وَرَسُولُهُ أَشْهَدُ أَنَّهُ بَلَّغَ الرِّسَالَةَ وَأَدَّى الْأَمَانَةَ وَنَصَحَ الْأُمَّةَ وَكَشَفَ الْغُمَّةَ وَجَاهَدَ فِي اللَّهِ حَقَّ جِهَادِهِ حَتَّى أَتَاهُ الْيَقِينُ وَصَلَوَاتُ اللَّهِ وَسَلَامُهُ عَلَيْهِ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ أَجْمَعِينَ وَمَنْ تَبِعَهُمْ بِإِحْسَانٍ إِلَى يَوْمِ الدِّينِ

أَمَّا بَعْدُ، فَإِنَّ أَصْدَقَ الْحَدِيثِ كِتَابُ اللَّهِ وَخَيْرَ الْهُدَى هُدَى مُحَمَّدٍ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَشَرَّ الْأُمُورِ مُحْدَثَاتُهَا وَكُلَّ مُحْدَثَةٍ بِدْعَةٌ وَكُلَّ بِدْعَةٍ ضَلَالَةٌ وَكُلَّ ضَلَالَةٍ فِي النَّارِ

The Virtue of the Companions

It is reported that one of the scholars of the Salaf — rahimahullahu ta'ala — said that when Allah first created humankind, he looked at the hearts of the people and he chose the most purest, the most honorable, the noblest of those hearts to be the heart of his Prophet and Messenger sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And then after the Prophets and Messengers of Allah, he looked at the hearts of the people and he chose the best of the hearts to be the companions of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam — wa radiyallahu anhum ajma'een.

And that is why, my dear brothers and sisters in Islam, it is from the tenets of our faith, from the aqeedah of Ahlus Sunnah wal Jama'ah, that we love all of the companions — radiyallahu anhum. They are, after the Messengers and Prophets of Allah, our role models and our shining examples. We defend their honor and we only speak good of them, and we take benefits from their lives and we take lessons from the situations that they were in.

Allah in the Quran speaks about their virtue, and he says — speaking about the immense reward that they will have on Yawm al-Qiyamah — in the final verse of Surah al-Bayyinah:

That their reward with their Lord is that they will have gardens of Jannah under which rivers flow, they will abide therein forever. For indeed Allah is pleased with them and they are pleased with him. That is for those who fear their Lord. Allah has guaranteed all of them Jannah.

And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam spoke about their virtues within this life and in this dunya, and it is sufficient to mention a single hadith from amongst those virtues — as is collected by Imam Muslim in his Sahih, on the authority of Abu Sa'id al-Khudri radiyallahu anhu — that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said:

(Sahih Muslim, Book 31, Hadith 6159)

The Prophet said sallallahu alayhi wasallam that a time would come upon the people when the people go out as an army — they go to fight — and so one of those people will ask the Muslim army: "Is there amongst you those who met the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam? Is there amongst you those who saw the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam?" And so they will say yes, and Allah will grant them victory. And then after this, another army will go out, and the people will ask: "Is there amongst you those who saw the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam?" And they will say yes, and Allah will give them victory. And then after some time, another army will come out, and then it will be asked: "Is there amongst you those who saw those who saw the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam?" — three generations away from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam — and they will say yes, and Allah will grant them victory. This hadith in and of itself is sufficient as a virtue of the companions — radiyallahu anhum.

Introducing Asma bint Abi Bakr

When we look at the lives of the companions — radiyallahu anhum — there are thousands to choose from, and hundreds from amongst those who are well known. And in this Khutbatul Jum'ah today, inshallah ta'ala, I want to focus on the life of a single companion — a great and illustrious companion of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. This companion belonged to a family in which there were four generations of companions: this companion, as well as being a companion, the child was a companion, the father was a companion, and the grandfather was a companion — radiyallahu anhum ajma'in.

I speak of none other than the great and illustrious companion Asma bint Abi Bakr — radiyallahu anha wa an abiha — a woman from the female companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And this shows to us the mercy and the wisdom that Allah had in choosing these companions to be the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, because he didn't just choose people that were all like Abu Bakr or all like Umar, or people who would all be scholars of Islam, or companions who would all be prolific narrators of hadith. Rather, you find each and every single segment of society presented and represented within the companions — radiyallahu anhum. You have the elderly, you have women, you have children, you have warriors, you have leaders, you have scholars, you have businessmen.

And so for me and you, when we come 1400 years after them — radiyallahu anhum — we can look at our situation and we can relate to not just a single one from amongst them, but from a whole group of them, from a whole segment and section from amongst the companions — radiyallahu anhum — because they are representative of me and you today. They represent us, our families, our children, wives, husbands. They had problems similar to our problems, they underwent issues similar to the issues that we are facing today.

Asma bint Abi Bakr — radiyallahu anha — was a companion. Her sister Aisha — radiyallahu anha — was a companion. Her father Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — was an illustrious companion. Her grandfather Abu Quhafa — radiyallahu anhu — was a companion. Her husband Zubayr ibn al-Awwam — radiyallahu anhu — was the cousin of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and a companion. And her son Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — was a companion. A single woman — her father, her grandfather, her husband, her sister, her son — all of them not only companions, but from amongst the most famous companions of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

Her Early Life and Household of Iman

Asma — radiyallahu anha — was from amongst the first people to enter into Islam. According to some of the books of biography and history, it is said that she is number 17 from amongst the first Muslims — the 17th person to accept Islam from the first batch of people who accepted Islam. And it is said that when she became Muslim she was 14–15 years old at that time, still a girl — radiyallahu anha wa ardaha — but she lived in a household of Iman and she was nurtured and educated by her father Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu.

The same Abu Bakr who when he would come to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam he would give all of his wealth in sadaqah and charity, and so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam would say to him: "O Abu Bakr, what have you left for your family?" And he would say: "I have left for them Allah, and I have left for them his messenger sallallahu alayhi wasallam." This is Asma — radiyallahu anha — who lived in the household of Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu.

The same Abu Bakr who when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam went on his night journey to the seven heavens and then came back in a single night, and then the people found out the next day and they thought that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam was a fraud and a liar — wal iyadu billah — so they came to Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — and they said to him: "Have you heard what your companion is now claiming?" And Abu Bakr had not yet received the news of the Isra and the Mi'raj, so he said to them: "What is he claiming?" So they told him what the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam was saying. And so Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — without having to go back to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, without having to verify those facts, he said to them: "I believe in him, for indeed I believe in that which is far greater than this — I believe that Allah gives him revelation directly from above the seven heavens." He didn't need to go back, didn't need to verify the facts, didn't need to do anything else.

Asma — radiyallahu anha — lived in this household, and you can see from her life how living with those types of parents, having been educated in this manner, how living in the household of Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — had an impact upon her, and not only her but also her children as well — radiyallahu anhum ajma'een.

Asma and the Hijrah

When the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam decided to make the Hijrah from Mecca to Medina, many of the companions had already migrated, but Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — stayed behind in the hopes that he would be allowed to accompany the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam came knocking on the door of Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — at a time of day when he would not usually frequent the house of Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — and then he entered upon him and said to him: الصُّحْبَةَ الصُّحْبَةَ — "You have my companionship, we shall go and make the Hijrah together."

And so it was Asma — radiyallahu anha — who at that time, still relatively at a young age, was the one who prepared the food parcels for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and her father Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu. She wasn't afraid that her father was leaving her, wasn't afraid that she would be left alone with her mother and her young siblings, wasn't afraid of how she would be able to migrate from Mecca to Medina. No — she took that time to make the food parcels for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and her father.

So when she came to make the parcels, she found that she had no cloth with which to wrap around them. So she took her scarf and she ripped it into two and she placed it around the two food parcels, and then she gave it to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu. And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam called her ذَاتُ النِّطَاقَيْنِ — "the possessor of the two pieces of cloth, the possessor of the two scarves" — and this was the title that stuck with her until she passed away — radiyallahu anha.

Defending the Honor of Her Father

When Abu Bakr and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam left, her grandfather Abu Quhafa — who at that time was an elderly man, still a non-Muslim, still upon shirk, blind due to old age — came to visit his grandchildren and he knocked on the door. Asma — radiyallahu anha — welcomed him and she let him into her house. And so he said to her: "Oh my granddaughter, your father has left you and he has taken all of his wealth with him and he has left you to fend for yourselves." And this was true, for when Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — left, he took all of his wealth with him — he didn't leave anything behind, he left only Allah's protection for his family.

But Asma — radiyallahu anha — was nurtured in a household of Iman, and she was not willing to sit silently while her grandfather attacked his own son, her father, or that she should think evil of Islam or evil of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So she said: "Rather, my grandfather, my father has left us much wealth." And so she went out and she took a pouch — a pouch which they would normally carry coins in — and she placed pebbles within the bag, and then she brought the bag and she began to make clinking sounds with the rocks and the pebbles within the pouch, saying to her grandfather: "Our father left us much wealth." And so Abu Quhafa, a blind old man at that time, he said: "If he has left you wealth, then he has done very good towards you," and then he left.

This is how Asma — radiyallahu anha — would defend the honor of Islam at a young age — not fearing for her own safety, not fearing of how she would leave Mecca with her family and her siblings and make their way to Medina, but defending her honor and the honor of her religion and the honor of her father and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

Bringing Food to the Cave of Thawr

As the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and Abu Bakr were staying in the mountain of Thawr — in the cave for three nights — as the search parties of the Meccans were searching for them, it was Asma — radiyallahu anha — who during the day would go out with food parcels, and she would travel to the outskirts of Mecca, and she would climb up the mountain, and she would bring food to her father and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

Asma — radiyallahu anha — during this time was at home one day and Abu Jahl came, knowing that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — had left together. So he knocked on the door of Abu Bakr, and Asma — radiyallahu anha — opened the door, and Abu Jahl was standing there with a group of men. He said to her: "Tell me where your father and Muhammad have gone, tell me where they have gone." But she refused to do so, and she said: "I don't know where they are." And so he slapped her on her face and he struck her with such force that she began to bleed — radiyallahu anha wa ardaha.

Her Arrival in Medina

And then after some time, Asma — radiyallahu anha — she too made the Hijrah. She made the Hijrah with her husband Zubayr — radiyallahu anhu — and Asma — radiyallahu anha — was pregnant at the time. And as she made the Hijrah towards Medina, she was the first person from amongst the Muhajireen to give birth in Medina, and she gave birth to her son Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — an illustrious companion of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam in his own right.

Her Life of Simplicity and Generosity

Asma — radiyallahu anha — says concerning herself: "We were poor when I married Zubayr — radiyallahu anhu. He was poor, he had neither wealth nor slaves nor any material possessions except for a single horse. And I was the one who would have to go and look after this horse. I would do the house chores, look after my family, cook for my husband, and then I would go and tend to his horse. And in order to bring the dried grass for the horse to eat, I would have to travel approximately 3km a day just to go and bring that grass back, and I would carry it upon my head and I would go in the heat of the day and I would bring it back to our house — radiyallahu anha wa ardaha."

She says: "One time I was walking and I had this grass upon my head, and as I was walking back, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam passed by with a group of other men — a group of companions. So he said to her: 'Why don't you ride? Why don't you ride and we will walk in front of you?' — they had a camel or a horse with them — 'Why don't you ride and we will walk in front of you?' She said: 'Due to my shyness, I was embarrassed at the situation, and I remembered the jealousy of my husband Zubayr, so I said no and I continued to walk back home — radiyallahu anha wa ardaha.'" Until her father Abu Bakr — radiyallahu anhu — later on would give her a servant, and she says: "It was as if he freed me from all of these responsibilities that I previously had."

Yet even though Asma — radiyallahu anha — was an extremely poor woman, married to the cousin of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam who was also a poor man, she was extremely generous. For the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said to her — as is collected in Sahih al-Bukhari — when she came to him one day and said: "O Messenger of Allah, I have no wealth except the little amount that Zubayr gives to me. So how should I give sadaqah? Should I give charity with this little amount of wealth that I have?"

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 1433)

The Prophet said sallallahu alayhi wasallam: "Give charity and do not hold back, lest Allah should hold back his provision from you. Give charity and don't hold back, lest Allah should hold back his provision from you."

And so she was — even though she was poor — an extremely generous woman — radiyallahu anha. She would say to the women: "Give sadaqah and give charity, and don't save up your wealth for tomorrow. For whoever begins to save up their wealth will never have enough in savings, and whoever spends without thinking, they won't worry about what they could have saved."

Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — her son, he says: "I never saw anyone more generous than my mother Asma and my aunt Aisha — radiyallahu anhuma — but they were different in their generosity. As for my aunt Aisha — radiyallahu anha — then she would save a small amount of wealth at a time, and when she had a small amount she would give sadaqah. But as for my mother Asma — radiyallahu anha — she would never save anything for the next day. If she received wealth today she would spend it immediately — radiyallahu anha."

And that is why it is said that if Asma — radiyallahu anha — became ill, she would free all of her slaves — because of a single illness — because she would know that this was a trial from Allah, that this illness was perhaps because of a sin that she had committed, some disobedience that she had done. And she would say: "Indeed this is because of my sin, and Allah has forgiven me for much more." And she would free all of the slaves that she had in her possession due to a single illness that she had — radiyallahu anha.

بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لِي وَلَكُمْ فِي الْقُرْآنِ وَالسُّنَّةِ وَنَفَعَنِي وَإِيَّاكُمْ بِمَا فِيهِمَا مِنَ الْآيَاتِ وَالْحِكْمَةِ، أَقُولُ مَا تَسْمَعُونَ وَأَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ لِي وَلَكُمْ وَلِجَمِيعِ الْمُسْلِمِينَ مِنْ كُلِّ ذَنْبٍ، فَاسْتَغْفِرُوهُ إِنَّهُ كَانَ غَفَّارًا

The Second Part of the Khutbah

الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ عَلَى إِحْسَانِهِ وَشُكْرُهُ عَلَى تَوْفِيقِهِ وَامْتِنَانِهِ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ تَعْظِيمًا لِشَأْنِهِ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ نَبِيَّنَا وَسَيِّدَنَا مُحَمَّدًا عَبْدُهُ وَرَسُولُهُ دَاعِيًا إِلَى رِضْوَانِهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ وَسَلَّمَ وَبَارَكَ عَلَيْهِ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ وَإِخْوَانِهِ وَسَلَّمَ تَسْلِيمًا كَثِيرًا، أَمَّا بَعْدُ

Her Final Years and the Steadfastness of Her Old Age

Asma bint Abi Bakr — radiyallahu anha wa an abiha — she lived until she was over a hundred years old. She was from the last women to die from amongst the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam from the Muhajireen.

Her son Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — grew up to become an illustrious companion of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and a leader and a warrior in his own right. After the death of Yazid ibn Muawiyah, he became the ruler of Mecca and the Hijaz, and other provinces like Egypt. And so he was the leader of Mecca. But after some time, the Umayyad Khulafa laid siege to Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — and Al-Hajjaj ibn Yusuf would end up finally capturing him and killing him — radiyallahu anhuma.

Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — in his final days came to his mother. And his mother was old at that time, nearly a hundred years old, and she was blind due to old age. But even though she was blind, according to some narrations of her biography, it is said that she had not yet lost a single tooth, nor was she in any way senile — she was still extremely intelligent. And they would say to her: "How come you have this intelligence?" And she would ascribe it to her upbringing — the fact that from a young age she obeyed Allah and she was involved in the worship of Allah. So Allah preserved her health for her even in old age.

Her Advice to Her Son

Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — came to her and he said: "I fear that my end is near, so what do you advise me?" So Asma bint Abi Bakr — radiyallahu anha — said: "O my son, if what you did, you did for the truth — you did because you felt it was the haqq — then you should be patient, for Allah will reward you and he will give you what is best for you. But if what you did, you did for one of the gains of the dunya — you did for one of the purposes of this world — then you are an evil son, for not only did you kill yourself but you killed all of those people who died for you."

And then Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr — radiyallahu anhuma — he left and he went back and he fought and he died — radiyallahu anhuma.

Her Confrontation with Al-Hajjaj

Al-Hajjaj ibn Yusuf went and he mutilated the body of Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr. Asma — radiyallahu anha — said to them: "Why doesn't he leave the body of my son alone?" Al-Hajjaj wanted to come and see Asma — radiyallahu anha — so he came into her house and he said to her: "We have killed this man who rebelled against us." She said to him: "He wasn't a rebel. Rather he was someone who would pray during the day and he would pray during the night, and he would fast during the day, and he was extremely dutiful to his mother. But indeed I heard the Prophet say sallallahu alayhi wasallam that from your tribe, Al-Hajjaj — from the tribe of Thaqeef — there will be a man who is a Kaddhab and a man who is a Mubeer — a man who is a liar and a man who will be destroyed. So as for the liar, we have already seen him — he was Al-Mukhtar ibn Abi Ubayd al-Thaqafi, the man who claimed to be a prophet after the death of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And as for the man who will be destroyed — I think it is you. I think it is you, Al-Hajjaj."

And then after a number of days after the death of her son Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr, she passed away — radiyallahu anha wa an abiha.

Lessons from the Life of Asma

Asma — radiyallahu anha — is one of those illustrious women that we find within our religion, we find from amongst the companions — radiyallahu anhum ajma'een. So the message from today's khutbah, my dear brothers and sisters in Islam, is twofold.

Number one: that when we take guides and we take examples and we take role models, we should look first and foremost to our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and the other Prophets and Messengers that Allah sent, and then we should look towards the companions of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam — wa radiyallahu anhum ajma'een.

The second message is that there is something for every single person to take from the lives of the companions. Asma — radiyallahu anha — was known to be one of the most knowledgeable of the companions in the sense that she wasn't like her sister Aisha — radiyallahu anha — to whom the scholars would come to seek knowledge, nor was she from amongst the most prolific narrators of hadith, nor was she known, for example, to be from those other companions who were extremely wealthy and so gave all of their wealth in charity — even though she was extremely generous. But Asma — radiyallahu anha — excelled in the way that she was brought up, and in the way that she was dutiful to her husband, and in the way that she brought up her own child Abdullah ibn al-Zubayr.

Asma — radiyallahu anha — was one of those women who didn't fear anything besides Allah. For Al-Hajjaj was one of those people — a tyrant and a dictator — that even grown men, courageous hardened battle-tested warriors, would tremble at the sight of Al-Hajjaj. But Asma — radiyallahu anha — stood firm, and she didn't fear him, for she only feared Allah.

And that is why, at the beginning of Islam, when her mother was still a non-Muslim and she came to visit her one day, Asma — radiyallahu anha — didn't know whether it was allowed in Islam for a Muslim child to be dutiful to a non-Muslim parent. So she went to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and she told him what had taken place, and she said: "O Messenger of Allah, I didn't want to do anything before I asked you — just in case I make a mistake, just in case I fall into sin — I wanted to ask you first." So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said to her: "Respect your mother and be dutiful to her." So she went back and she showed respect to her mother — radiyallahu anha.

This is Asma — radiyallahu anha — and I don't have time to go into all of the different facets of her life and all of the different stories in her biography. She lived for a hundred years, and Allah made her one of the companions who was unique in the sense that she has four generations of Muslims within her family, and all of those people who are close to her are illustrious companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.