The Test Of Life And The Virtue Of Forgiveness

The Reality of This Life as a Test

My dear respected brothers and elders, respected sisters in Islam — the reality of this life that we are all passing through is that it is a test from Allah. Allah has created this system of life and death as a test to see who amongst us is best in our actions. Allah says He is the one who has created life and death:

Who amongst you are the best in their deeds.

And the test that comes from Allah comes in various forms. There are different ways this test from Allah takes place in our lives. And one of the ways the test of Allah comes in our life is through our mutual relations and our experiences with one another — and the way we behave with one another.

Allah has created us with different temperaments and different ways that we react in different situations. And when we are faced with such people who may react in an unfavorable manner — whether they are verbally abusing us, or beyond that, they are hurting us in any shape or form — this is a test from Allah: how do we react in that situation?

This is an opportunity for us that if we are able to control our anger, and if we are able to move past that, and even beyond not responding in a like manner — if we are able to embody within us the great quality of forgiveness, forgiving the individual for the sake of Allah — then this test we have passed with flying colors. This would be an opportunity for us to gain closeness to Allah, to gain great palaces in Jannah.

The Promise of the Prophet ﷺ for the One Who Forgives

Rasulullah ﷺ has said in a very emphatic manner — with so much emphasis, subhanAllah, he did not need to use these words — but he said:

(Sunan Abi Dawud, Hadith 4800)

Ana za'eem — "I personally take the responsibility" — that the person who forgives someone despite being on the right, on haqq; tarakal miraa — he leaves argumentation, he leaves the fight, and he is on haqq, he is on muhaqq, he is not on batil, he is not on falsehood — he has the right to fight, but he gives it up for the sake of Allah — that he will have a qasr, a palace in the best portion of Jannah. Such a palace which will be eternal; they will remain there forever and ever. This is the promise of Rasulullah ﷺ.

So when we have such a situation — when someone is verbally abusing us, someone is being rude to us, someone has hurt us beyond that even — we can weigh our options. We have an opportunity to gain, or to suffer a loss. Suffering the loss in the sense that when we reply back, if we cross the limits and go beyond what is justified, then we have ended up committing zulm ourselves.

The Quranic Principle: Justice or Forgiveness

Allah says:

If you are wronged, yes, you do have the right legally to respond in a like manner. However, if you are patient and you forgive the individual for the sake of Allah, then the reward you will get as the one who is patient is far better than that worldly compensation you are looking for. It is a far better deal, a far greater bargain.

Allah also says:

And if someone wrongs you, then the jaza' — meaning the compensation — for that is sayyiatun mithluhaa — something of a like nature, similar to that. But the one who forgives and he reconciles, then his reward is none other than Allah. And when Allah is rewarding, then he rewards how? Bi ghayri hisaab — without any measure. The tremendous rewards that await for the one who forgives for the sake of Allah.

The Example of Prophet Yusuf (عليه السلام)

We have examples from the Anbiya (عليهم السلام), we have examples from our beloved Rasul ﷺ in his noble seerah, and we have examples of our salaf — pious predecessors — how in the most trying circumstances, most difficult conditions they faced, they forgave for the sake of Allah.

At the end of Surah Yusuf, we see when Yusuf (عليه السلام) and his father and mother and the entire family have the grand reunion — it is such a heartfelt moment, we see the emotions coming through in such a joyous occasion:

That Yusuf (عليه السلام) brings his old feeble parents onto the throne as well, and they all fall in prostration to him. He says, "Oh my dear father, this is now the interpretation of the dream that I had seen in my childhood, when I had narrated to you..."

Way in the beginning of Surah Yusuf, we see the dream where Yusuf (عليه السلام) tells his father:

"Oh my dear father, I see eleven stars and the sun and the moon — I see them in prostration to me." Then he says:

"Oh my dear son, do not tell anyone — do not tell your brothers in particular — this dream, for they may plot against you. Indeed, Shaytan for the human being is an open enemy — he will misguide them."

So now Yusuf (عليه السلام), at the end of the story — subhanAllah — he says at the end of the surah:

"This is now the interpretation of the dream that I had seen before. My Lord, my Rabb — Allah — has made it come true." And he says:

"Allah did such ihsan upon me, he was so kind to me, when he took me out of the jail." SubhanAllah — wait a second, were you born in the jail? You weren't born in the jail. So how did you even get in the jail?

He is completely glossing over — not glossing over, rather forgetting about that part. He is not even mentioning how he got in the jail — through wrongful accusation, allegation of such a serious crime which he never committed. He was running away from her, and he got put in jail for this type of assault which he is completely innocent of. And he was not only wrongfully accused — he was convicted, and he was sentenced for years, nine years. He skipped over the whole nine years in the torture in the jail. He says, subhanAllah, ahsana bi — "He did ihsan upon me, and he did a great favor upon me, when he took me out from the jail."

"And he brought you, my parents, from when you were in Canaan — in the desert area — he brought you from there, from the difficult life you were suffering as Bedouins, to the city of Egypt, to the capital. And this happened after the occurrence of Shaytan — he had caused that division between my brothers and myself." So not only did he forgive the brothers — subhanAllah — he did not even blame them. Rather he passed the blame, passed the buck onto Shaytan. He said: min ba'di an nazagha al-shaytanu bayni wa bayna ikhwati — "this happened after Shaytan had caused the division between my brothers and me."

Yusuf (عليه السلام) Reveals Himself to His Brothers

And when the brothers had asked him for forgiveness — when he was speaking to them — he began the discussion of identifying himself by asking a question:

He asked them: "Do you remember what you did to Yusuf and his brother — and how you plotted against them, how you hurt him, planned to kill him, threw him into the well to die potentially or be picked up by anyone? Do you remember what you did to Yusuf, back when you were jahil?" — Not that you would do something like that now or in the future. So even when he asked them the question, he already gave them the excuse: idh antum jahiloon — "prior, when you were jahil, when you were ignorant, before you had knowledge, before you were rightly guided — remember what you did back then in your jahalah. Of course you are not capable of committing such an act now."

So they thought among themselves — wait a second, how is he asking us such a question? No one knows about what happened except us, and we did not tell anyone, and the victim is not one of us. So the only logical option left is that he must be the victim. And they thought in their mind — subhanAllah — if you project how that child was, and decades later how he may look, this may be the same person. That is why then they said:

"Wait a second, are you truly Yusuf himself?" He said, "Yes, I am Yusuf and this is my brother, Binyamin. Allah has done a great favor upon us. Indeed, whoever has taqwa and has sabr — Allah will not allow the rewards of those who do good to be wasted."

So they asked for forgiveness. They said:

SubhanAllah — "Oh Yusuf, Allah has preferred you above us. He had granted you beauty as a child, then he granted you taqwa, he granted you nubuwwah — prophethood — he granted you honor from a worldly level, he granted you this position of the wazir of the whole kingdom of Egypt." Laqad atharakallah — "Allah has given you much more preference over us." Wa in kunna lakhat'iin — "We are all sinners, we have committed major mistakes."

So Yusuf (عليه السلام) says:

He says, "There is no blame upon you today. And I not only forgive you — I ask Allah to forgive you. And He is the most merciful of those who show mercy."

The Prophet ﷺ Quotes Yusuf at the Conquest of Mecca

And this statement of forgiveness of Yusuf (عليه السلام) was so epic that Rasulullah ﷺ himself quoted it in his seerah — when he entered triumphantly into Mecca al-Mukarramah in the 8th year of Hijrah.

Consider — 13 years in Mecca he faced torture. His family — they tortured his wife Khadijah (رضي الله عنها) until she passed away in the 10th year of Nabuwwah. The 'am al-huzn — the year of grief — his uncle Abu Talib passed away. They were boycotted for 2-3 years in the valley of Abu Talib. How many of his companions died, were killed, were martyred, made shaheed — besides all of the other abuses that they faced — to the point that they had to migrate to Habasha on two occasions, and finally to Madinatul Munawwarah. They had to leave their home. And after they left their home and migrated as refugees, still they did not end their opposition — Battle of Badr, Battle of Uhud, Battle of Khandaq — they kept on attacking Rasulullah ﷺ.

Now when he enters triumphantly into Mecca al-Mukarramah — this was the era, there are no Geneva Conventions, and this was the time when the vanquished nation would be put to death potentially, or the entire population could have been enslaved, or at least the top criminals could have faced retribution that they rightfully — in fact, we could say — deserved. But Rasulullah ﷺ — what did he say? SubhanAllah. He quoted this ayah from Surah Yusuf and he said:

(Referenced in Tafsir Ibn Kathir and Sirah literature; related narrations in Sahih Ibn Hibban and al-Bayhaqi's Dala'il al-Nubuwwah)

He said, "I will not say anything to you more than what Yusuf ibn Ya'qub ibn Ishaq ibn Ibrahim — Khalilullah, 'alayhimus-salam — the whole lineage of Anbiya — what he said to his brothers, I will say to you nothing more than that." And what is that? He quoted the ayah: La tathreeba 'alaykumul yawm, yaghfirullahu lakum, wa Huwa arhamur rahimeen — "May Allah forgive you, and I have forgiven you for the sake of Allah."

Two Paths Before Us

So anyone of us who has been wronged by any individual — who feels that we have been wronged in our interactions with our family members, in our interactions at business, in our interactions with anyone at any capacity in our life — then we have two paths in front of us. Allah says:

Two paths. We can continue to harbor that anger, continue to harbor that resentment. And if we go ahead and take retribution and we end up crossing the limits, we will actually be in the negative — we ourselves will become a zalim in the court of Allah. We can continue to allow this resentment to build inside, this hatred to fester inside — which, as has now been proven through medical studies as well, contributes to hypertension, to blood pressure, to all different diseases. And we are suffering — who is suffering? The individual who wronged us may not be suffering today, but we ourselves, by harboring those negative feelings, are actually hurting our own selves.

Or, on the other hand, we can adopt a path of forgiveness for the sake of Allah. And we let that go. And we say: "Oh Allah, I need your forgiveness on Yawm al-Qiyamah. I am forgiving this individual so that inshallah I can be worthy of and deserving of your forgiveness on the Day of Qiyamah." And we clean our heart.

This is actually considered to be the highest form of akhlaq. And when we say it is the highest form of akhlaq, there are two things that are included in this statement. Number one is that it means that it has the greatest reward. And the reason it has the greatest reward is because the reward is proportionate to how difficult the task is — meaning it is actually the most difficult thing to do.

In the different chapters that come under akhlaq, you will find the action of feeding people who are hungry, and you will find the action of helping people who are weak and oppressed. These actions are considered to be easier, and therefore less rewarding, than the one who actually forgives someone for the sake of Allah. This may be counterintuitive because there is no money that is being spent and there is no physical action that is required — because you do not write a check, you don't see money leaving your account, nor are you physically engaging in backbreaking service. It may seem that it is painless — no movement required. But in reality, this is something that happens internally in the heart. It is something that is beyond lip service. There are many who may forgive with the tongue, but there are very few who actually remove every single ounce of negative feeling from the heart. This is something truly difficult — therefore it is truly rewarding.

The Hadith of the Bonus Deeds on the Day of Judgment

To the extent that Rasulullah ﷺ mentioned in a hadith: on the Day of Judgment, when Allah will distribute the books of deeds, then there will be some individuals who will open their book of deeds and they will see such tremendous reward — so many rewards for so many actions — that they will be very excited. But then they will end up becoming sad and they will say: "Ya Allah, this is so great — the only problem is that this is not going to help us because this has reached the wrong address. This does not belong to me. This is a book of deeds for someone else, because I never did all of these good deeds." So if you receive something by mistake and then you realize that you are not deserving of that honor, you will be called back and it will be taken away from you — so they will become sad. They will say: "Ya Allah, so many amazing rewards — whoever receives this book of deeds, whoever it truly belongs to, is so fortunate."

Then Allah will say: "There is no mistake today. This book of deeds is actually your book of deeds — it does belong to you." They will say: "Ya Allah, how in the world does this belong to me when I never did all of these actions?" Then Allah will reply: "This is the reward you are receiving in exchange for all those individuals who had hurt you in the worldly life, and you forgave them for the sake of Allah. In exchange for forgiving them for the sake of Allah, you are receiving all of these bonus rewards — without having done them, without even making intention for them. From nowhere, Allah is granting you all of these good deeds."

At that moment, the hadith of Rasulullah ﷺ further states that those individuals — when they will see this — subhanAllah — then they will wish from the bottom of their hearts: "Ya Allah, we only wish — we have one desire — and that desire is: ya Allah, please, we beg from you — please send us back to the world. And oh Allah, please we beg from you that you make musallat — meaning you send upon us, you impose upon us — such enemies who will torture us." And the words come in the hadith that they will take iron combs and they will separate our skin from our flesh — where all the receptors of the pain are — they will torture us to that extent. "We wish for that, so that we can have an opportunity to forgive them. Because at the end of the day, it will be so worth it."

So we have an opportunity to forgive them. Then Allah will say: "No one will have an opportunity to go back."

We know about the disbelievers — they will be wishing to go back too. We have heard that many times, it is right in the Quran — "Oh our Lord, we have seen Jannah with our eyes — send us back into the worldly life, we will do righteous actions this time." Allah will say: Kalla — absolutely no chance to go back. That is also very significant, many things to learn there. But this one comes in the hadith as well — these people are going to Jannah, they are getting a bonus reward in Jannah for forgiving, but they are desiring another chance and to voluntarily be tortured, to have the opportunity to forgive — because they have seen the reward for forgiveness.

Now, this does not mean we go out of our way to ask Allah in this worldly life: "Oh Allah, send enemies upon us." We do not ask for that. But who is there who has not been hurt by anyone? And instead of crying about it — or worse, plotting against those individuals and trying to bring them down, trying to hurt them back, trying to see how you can destroy their life — rather, let us take this as an opportunity. Wow. This is an opportunity others will be begging for on the Day of Judgment, and they will not have. This is an opportunity to cash out on palaces in Jannah, on eternal reward in Jannah — and to have a free, beautiful life right here in this world. As psychologists, psychiatrists, and medical experts are proving too — that by relieving this tension, you will have an enjoyable life here. And you can dream about the rewards you will receive in the akhira as well.

The Example of Abu Bakr al-Siddiq (رضي الله عنه)

May Allah make us among those who learn to forgive for the sake of Allah. Allah says:

From your spouses and your children there may be enemies — they may be those who treat you as enemies. And if you forgive them, and you are merciful to them, and you cover their sins — then indeed Allah is forgiving and merciful.

Allah also says:

Allah speaks about Abu Bakr (رضي الله عنه). When Mistah (رضي الله عنه) — one of his family members whom he was supporting with monthly rations and money — ends up becoming a participant among those who accused his daughter, Aisha al-Siddiqah (رضي الله عنها), in the false allegation with respect to her husband Rasulullah ﷺ. And Abu Bakr (رضي الله عنه) gets so angry — he says: "How can I support such a man who has made this worst accusation against the honor of my daughter, the wife of Rasulullah ﷺ? I will never support him anymore."

Allah says: this does not befit the Siddiq to behave in such a manner. Falya'fu walyas-fahu — "He should forgive him." Ala tuhibboona an yaghfirallahu lakum — "Do you not wish that Allah forgives you?" So he forgave him for the sake of Allah. And let us follow his footsteps.

May Allah make us among those who can clean our hearts for His sake, and be deserving of this great reward.