How The Prophet Won Hearts With His Character

All About the Prophet ﷺ — Winning the Hearts of Those Around Him

Considering that we're speaking about the Prophet ﷺ, let us begin by reciting some salawat upon the Prophet ﷺ in our hearts, on our tongues:

The Power of Salawat Upon the Prophet ﷺ

In a famous hadith of Jami' at-Tirmidhi, Ubayy ibn Ka'b (may Allah be pleased with him) asks the Prophet ﷺ:

(Jami' at-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2457)

"O Prophet of Allah, I read abundant durood sharif upon you. How much should I make? How much durood sharif should I stipulate for you from my du'a?" — essentially, from my time.

So Rasulullah ﷺ says, "However much you can, and there is khair and goodness within it." So he says, ar-rubu' — "Shall I do a quarter?" The Prophet ﷺ says, "That's good." Then he adds:

"If you increase it, if you read more salawat, it is better for you." So he says, an-nisf — "Shall I do half?" Rasulullah ﷺ says that's fine, that's good. But if you increase it, it's better for you.

He is essentially asking: "When I make du'a to Allah or I am living my day-to-day life — how much of the portion of what I do in my tasbihat, my dhikr of Allah — how much of that should be durood?" He keeps increasing the amount, and here he says:

"All of my time — all of the times when I am making du'a — I will spend it in reading durood and salawat upon you." The Prophet ﷺ then tells him some golden words which I can tell you, and many people who have practiced this in their lives will tell you that this is an absolutely genius way of solving the problems of your life. He says:

(Jami' at-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2457)

"If you do that — if you spend your day-to-day life and the vast majority of your time reading salawat upon the Prophet ﷺ — all of your worries, anxieties, and problems of this world, you will be sufficed." Sufficed by whom? Sufficed by Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. One of the names of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is Al-Kafi — He who is sufficient.

In fact, when the Prophet ﷺ went through insults and loads of difficulties, punishments, and oppression from the kuffar and the polytheists of Mecca, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala consoled him with this very name — "Allah will suffice you for them. Don't worry, O my beloved Prophet, Allah will suffice you." Here, the Prophet ﷺ is giving us the solution for that same problem. For us it may not be people oppressing us — it may be our own life problems, issues with our children, issues with our wealth, issues with our health. So many different problems we could have. The Prophet ﷺ says: if you make all of your day and night, and the time you have that you want to spend in dhikr, in salawat upon the Prophet ﷺ — your entire difficulties and problems will be sufficed.

How Did the Prophet ﷺ Win the Hearts of Those Around Him?

Let's come back to the topic. How did the Prophet ﷺ win the hearts of those around him? I just want to quote a few ahadith — we have limited time.

Firstly, the Prophet ﷺ has clearly told us in a hadith recorded in Jami' at-Tirmidhi that a Muslim — a true Muslim:

(Jami' at-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2507; Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 4032)

That believer, that Muslim who spends time in the company of other people — and I come from a non-Muslim country, the UK; you are also in a non-Muslim country — those people who live in the company of those who are not from their own religion, or who are from their own religion but from a different community, and he has patience with them, and he knows how to interact with them, and he knows how to bring them closer to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, bring them closer to the religion of Islam — is better than that person who stays all alone inside like a monk in his own monastery, does not interact with the people, and does not bring people close to the religion of Islam.

That is why Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says in the Holy Qur'an:

"Who is better than that person who calls to the path of Allah, does good deeds, and says: I am from the believers?"

And then Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says: Do not recompense evil with evil. If someone does evil to you, don't just automatically give evil back to them straight away. Rather, repay evil with goodness:

Then that same person who had enmity with you, who had a gripe with you, who had an issue with you — when he does something evil to you but you do something good back — suddenly he will become from an enemy to a close friend.

And the Prophet ﷺ was the living embodiment of this. I just want to quote a few ahadith in this regard. When Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) was asked, "Can you describe to me the character of the Prophet ﷺ?" she said, "Read the Qur'an."

(Sahih Muslim, Hadith 746; Sunan Abu Dawud, Hadith 1342)

"His character was the Qur'an."

The Conquest of Makkah — A Living Embodiment

On the day of the conquest of Makkah — a very famous hadith — I just want to quote this because it shows a living embodiment of this Quranic ayah. The Prophet ﷺ lived the Qur'an.

When he came in as the person who had now conquered Makkah, he enters the city — the same people that used to oppress him, the same people who oppressed his companions, the same people who swore at him, the same people who put the intestines of a camel upon his back while he was performing Salah, the same people who expelled him from his own land, the same people who made a plot to actually kill him before he managed to escape to Madinah Munawwarah. What does he do as he enters this city as a conqueror?

The Prophet ﷺ asked them:

"What do you think I am going to do to you?" Because naturally this is a person who they used to insult, mock, and attack — and they killed so many of his companions and tortured so many of his companions. Now he has come back and Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has given him victory over their lands. So they responded:

"We think you'll do good with us. You are noble, you are a son of a noble person, and you are a nephew of a noble person. You are coming from a noble lineage. Inshallah you will do good to us."

The Prophet ﷺ then said to them:

(As-Sirah an-Nabawiyyah of Ibn Hisham; referenced in Tafsir Ibn Kathir under Quran 12:92)

"I will say to you the same words that Yusuf ﷺ said to his brothers when he met them in Egypt so many years later — when he had now become a minister, and those same brothers that had thrown him in the well, he now looks at them and forgives them, and says: 'There is no reproach upon you today. May Allah forgive you, and He is the Most Merciful of the merciful.'"

What do you think was the effect of this forgiveness that the Prophet ﷺ gave to these people? The vast majority of them accepted Islam. And so the lesson for you and I living in the western countries is: a lot of these people that we interact with outside of our masajid, outside of even our religion — they may look as though they are not very good people, or they may look like they are living very decadent lives. But if we work on their hearts and we call them, and we show them the true message of Islam, sometimes their hearts are very soft, and they will actually accept the religion of Islam.

The Bedouin and Mu'adh ibn Jabal — No Filter

There is a very famous hadith of the Prophet ﷺ — and this hadith also makes me laugh a little bit. It's in the Sunan of Imam Abu Dawud. Again, the whole topic is: how did the Prophet ﷺ interact with people and win the hearts of people? The people just loved him. The people would automatically be inclined towards the Prophet ﷺ simply because of the way he would interact with them.

There is a hadith in Sunan Abu Dawud where a Bedouin comes to the Prophet ﷺ. Now remember — the sahaba always used to say that when a Bedouin used to come to ask the Prophet ﷺ a question, they'd get very excited because he had no — what's the English word? He had no filter. He had no boundaries. He just says what he needs to say. You get those people in life. He'd just ask whatever he needed to ask. The sahaba had respect for the Prophet ﷺ — sometimes if he's your teacher, you're scared to ask a question. But then someone comes into the masjid, into the gathering, into the lesson, who doesn't know that he's your great teacher and scholar — he'll just ask a question. The Bedouins were a bit like this — they were sincere, but when they came, they would just ask whatever they needed to ask.

So the Bedouin — he used to perform salah with Mu'adh ibn Jabal, and he didn't know how to recite the Qur'an. So he came to complain to the Prophet ﷺ. And if you look at the word dandana — it literally sounds like its meaning — that "I don't know all this that you're doing in your salah. I don't know what you're reciting." He tells the Prophet ﷺ: "I am just going to do the tasbih and dhikr of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala in my salah. I don't know how to do all this." (And by the way, from this, the scholars extract a number of rulings — such as: what is the ruling if a person doesn't know how to recite the Qur'an in salah?)

But anyway — how would you respond to this? How would a person react to another person coming and just confronting him like this? He has brought such a beautiful religion, he's teaching them, he's trying his best, his companions are doing the best of teaching, and a random musalli comes shouting. How would we respond?

The Prophet ﷺ smiled. He looked at him and said — we're kind of in the same category, we're roaming around the same block. Essentially: "You're doing dhikr of Allah. We're also doing another dhikr of Allah, which is the Qur'an. It's the same thing." At this moment, the Prophet ﷺ understood the people he was interacting with. He knew that this Bedouin — there's no point trying to shout at him and say "Learn the Qur'an." He understood: for now, no problem, you carry on what you're doing. And this is what you call diffusing a situation — learning how to win the heart of the person around you, and learning how to make that person more inclined towards the religion of Islam. If we are true ambassadors of the religion of Islam.

Zayd ibn Thabit — The Neighbor of the Prophet ﷺ

In a hadith recorded by Imam al-Bayhaqi in his Al-Adab, Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) states — and remember, Anas ibn Malik had a very special connection with the Prophet ﷺ. He says that when the Prophet ﷺ entered Madinah Munawwarah, the entire city lit up. He's saying the nur of the Prophet ﷺ brought the whole city alight — it was booming and shining. And when he passed away, the whole city went into darkness. That's how much it affected him.

There is also another hadith — in Al-Tirmidhi — about another sahabi, Zayd ibn Thabit (may Allah be pleased with him), just to show you the connection the sahaba had. When Zayd ibn Thabit was asked to describe the Prophet ﷺ, he said:

"What can I tell you? How much time have you got? I was his neighbor. When revelation would descend upon him, he would send for me and I would write it for him. When we would be discussing worldly issues, he would come and join our gathering — he was one of us. He would come and discuss worldly issues with us. And when we would be discussing the hereafter and we would be crying and it would be a state of emotion, he would be in that same gathering, discussing the akhira with us."

He lived with his people. Mukhalitat al-nas — as the first hadith I quoted — a person who lives with his community, interacts with them, goes through those difficulties with them. They may confront him — like that same Bedouin did to the Prophet ﷺ — but he makes sabr. He has patience. He knows how to win the heart of this person, how to win the heart of the community. And that also applies to us as Muslims — when we're living with the non-Muslims, we should know how to win the hearts of these non-Muslims and bring them towards the fold of Islam.

The Bedouin Who Grabbed the Prophet ﷺ

Back to Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him). The Prophet ﷺ was distributing wealth from the spoils of war. Anas ibn Malik says that he was with the Prophet ﷺ, and he had on a very thick, bulky garment — you could say like a jacket. Then:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 3149; Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1057)

A Bedouin snatched this garment — grabbed the jacket — hard. Can you imagine? The Prophet ﷺ, this Bedouin — can you imagine if someone did that to a local Imam? He grabs the jacket and not only does he grab it, he causes pain to the Prophet ﷺ. He actually leaves a mark on the shoulder of the Prophet ﷺ. Then:

He doesn't even say "O Prophet of Allah." He doesn't say "O Nabi of Allah." He doesn't say "O Rasulullah ﷺ." He says, "O Muhammad — give me two of the camels that Allah has given you from this wealth. Because you're not giving me your wealth or your dad's wealth — you're giving me Allah's wealth." Can you imagine how insolent, how rude.

The Prophet ﷺ became quiet. Then he said: "The wealth — you're right. It belongs to Allah, and I am the servant of Allah." He then gave him the wealth. But then he stopped the Bedouin and said: "Wait — hold on."

"What about the mark you've caused on my shoulder? The wealth — no problem, you're right, it's the wealth of Allah, I'll give it to you — no problem. But what about the mark on my shoulder? I now need to make a mark on your shoulder." So the Bedouin said:

"No, it's not happening." So the Prophet ﷺ — again, look at the way he diffuses the situation — says: "Why? Why are you not going to let me take revenge on you, or make a mark on your shoulder in the same way you made a mark on mine?" He says:

"Because you are not a person who repays evil with evil."

The Prophet ﷺ laughed and smiled, then commanded that he be given the amount of wealth that he wanted to ask for.

Four Books to Read on the Prophet ﷺ

There are a few books that I want to finally recommend before we completely finish. When a scholar from Bahrain recently came to our madrasa in the UK, he said the scholars of the past would make a complete habit of reading these four books. And by the way, these four books are now available in English — most of them, to the best of my knowledge. The scholars of the past would actually give these books as a gift to one another and would have recitals of these. In fact, after he left, my teacher Mufti Shabbir Sahib actually immediately commanded that we have a recital of one of those books that he mentioned. I want you to try to remember these four books, and if you can get an English copy, you should do so.

In fact, Sheikh Abdul Fattah, a great scholar, used to have one of these books right close to his bed so that he could read it as much as possible on a day-to-day basis.

The first book is the Shama'il of Imam at-Tirmidhi — Shama'il al-Muhammadiyya — wherein he describes the character of the Prophet ﷺ. This character is what is going to help us in the west in dealing with the issues that we have.

The second book is a book by Qadi Iyad rahimahullah called Ash-Shifa bi Ta'rif Huquq al-Mustafa.

The third book is a poem written by Imam al-Busiri called Al-Qasida al-Burda.

The fourth book is a salawat book with tremendous benefits called Dala'il al-Khayrat.

We should make a habit — the final two books you could actually read in Arabic if you know Arabic. The first two are books that you would read more for the benefit of the translation and explanation. The first two were Ash-Shama'il and Ash-Shifa, and the second two were Qasida al-Burda and Dala'il al-Khayrat.

Closing Du'a

So we pray to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala that He allows us to bring within our lives these beautiful characteristics of the Prophet ﷺ. He allows us to win the hearts of those around us. Remember — we are parents, we are teachers. Every day we are worried about our children, especially in the west: how are we going to make sure that they stay upon the right path, stay upon the path of the sunnah, stay in the religion of Islam? That literally is the challenge in the west. One of the most important ways we are going to be able to do this is to win the heart of those children — to make sure that we look after them with love and affection, make them accustomed and inclined towards the religion of Islam.

We pray to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala that He grants us the muhabba of the Prophet ﷺ and that we bring within us these beautiful characteristics. Jazakumullahu khairan. Wa akhiru da'wana anil-hamdulillah.

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Du'a Requests

We know the difficulties that our Muslim brothers and sisters are going through in Palestine and Gaza in particular. So we should continuously make du'a for ease. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala remove their suffering. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala grant victory to the Palestinians and free Masjid al-Aqsa.

Please make du'a for brother Habib Siddiqui for a speedy and complete recovery. Du'a shifa request for the grandfather of D.S. — one of the students here — who was diagnosed with cancer.

Sister Nisreen Taj passed away in Karachi. Please make du'a for her maghfirah.

As we know also, the riots are continuing in Bangladesh. There is a request for du'a that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala ease those difficulties.