2014-09-19 - Friday Prayer - Sheikh Khalil Abdul Rashid

The Orphan-Demic: Our Duty to Fatherless Children

The way to correct society was to remind them of the furood, the wajib, the duty of raising and protecting and performing the obligations that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has enjoined upon them — to take care of children. And so he proceeded to write not a little risalah, not a few pages, but two volumes. Two volumes of this work, which I have in my office, on the ahkam of the sigar — the rules dealing with minor children. The text he called it Jami' — the collection — the ahkam of sigar.

And he says: if a society ignores its sigar, if a people, if a society ignores the care of children — the duty to take care of children — then with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, that society will be saghir, which means humiliated. If you do not take care of your little ones, then you will be little and you will be belittled in the realm of Allah. If you don't look after those people whom you have — whom we have — a duty to care for, then how can we expect to have special care with Allah? Very, very profound.

The Crisis of Fatherlessness in America

According to last year's statistics — statistics for 2013 for the United States of America — one in three children: every three children you see, one of them is being raised in some type of home without a father. Let that sink in for a second. Last year's statistics: one in three children is without a father.

Of all the homes in the United States of America, according to last year's statistics, when you look at these homes where there is one parent, 84% of single-parent homes — 84% — are single moms. Where are the dads? Single moms make up the overwhelming majority of the household in this country.

And the definition of the orphan is the child whose father is not dead — whose father is absent. The child whose father is absent. Not there. He might be overseas, he might be someplace else, he might be living — but he is not in the home. We live in a time where children who are being raised without fathers are considered, from a Shari'i point of view, yatims — orphans.

We have what I call an orphan-demic. You know what epidemic is, pandemic is — we have in this country an orphan-demic. Too many kids growing up without fathers. And this is what Imam al-Ashrooni was writing about — that we have to take notice of what's going on in our society and we have to look at what's missing. And so from his perspective, he said what is missing is the ideal — the actions of caring for children and understanding that these kids that don't have fathers, that need to be fostered, that need to be cared for — the fact that they are not being cared for means that ultimately society pays the price.

The Quranic Command: Ihsan to the Yatim

From the Quranic perspective, the command to do ihsan — to be virtuous with the yatim — is right at the same level as the command to be virtuous with the parents and relatives:

Be virtuous to both parents — not just one. And all of your relatives — you must be virtuous and honorable, and you have a duty, a responsibility to support them and care for them and make sure they're not abandoned. And that duty extends to children whose father is absent.

Foster Care in the Fiqh Literature

When we look at the fiqh literature and see how this command in the Quran plays out on the ground — in the realm of ahkam, in the realm of fiqh, our fiqhi rulings — in the chapter of trade, كِتَابُ الْبُيُوعِ, in the chapter under the contracts, there is a sub-chapter called بَابُ اللَّقِيطِ — the chapter of picking up children that are abandoned from the road.

Why would something related to foster care and adoption and picking up children — why would that be in the chapter on contracts? Very ajib — amazing. You have to think about that. Why isn't something like that in the chapter on marriage or family? It's not even with the family matters. It's with buying and selling. And what's even more profound is that it's found under the section on renting. You have to look in the renting section. So under buying and selling you see all of these ahkam on how to do a contract — chapters on making a corporate partnership, buying in advance, all of these things, the prohibition of riba, etc. Then you turn the page and there's renting — how to establish a rental contract — and then down further, as you're looking at the ahkam for renting: picking up a lost child. What does that have to do with renting? Why in the chapter on trade?

It is because when you reflect deeply — when we understand what's going on in the mind of the fuqaha — you see the chapter on renting has to do with the responsibility of service. Renting is when you pay a fee: you give something and you get a service in return. You pay something and you get a service. And that relationship — where you give and take — is part of not just a physical contract, but you have a responsibility that has effect in the social contract as well.

And so caring for children without fathers is part of a social contract, and it is a service that you are required to do. You rent your wealth to take care of that child, and in return Allah will take care of you. It's a social contract. That's why it's in the chapter of contracts. And what you are renting is yourself — your money, your time. "I'm gonna take care of this kid. I'm gonna foster this kid. Bring this child into my home." Because to not do that — to see that there are children out here that need to be cared for when we have the ability to do it —

And by the way, in the chapter on laqeet, the ulema say that it is fard kifaya — it is a communal obligation — to care for kids that don't have dads. Now, the way we do adoption: we don't have adoption in the Christian sense, but we do have a form of that which is different. Because the duty to take care of kids that are in foster homes, that don't have dads, is binding communally. And the jurists write that it is fard kifaya — a communal obligation — and it sits under two ayahs.

The first is the ayah that says:

Whoever gives life to this child — it is as if they've given life to all of humanity. Look at that. لَا حَوْلَ وَلَا قُوَّةَ إِلَّا بِاللَّهِ. You give somebody a chance — you take a risk — you rent yourself and your family, your wealth, to help provide sustenance and shelter, safety, love for some child. It is as if you've given life to every single human being. So it's a communal obligation in that sense.

And in a different sense, Allah Ta'ala says in the Quran — and the ulema say this ayah is a dalil for this act:

Cooperate together — get together, establish something, and help each other — work to establish birr, righteousness, and taqwa. We have to help each other. Reference to the social contract.

But if we neglect that duty and we fall back on it, then that is violence to that child or to that family. And what happens is willfully neglecting and turning a face — thinking "that's not my problem" — not doing anything about this orphan-demic that we have, is a form of violence.

The Ruling on Abandoned Children in Islamic Law

And the ulema make a profound statement. When I first learned this, I was completely blown away. What's the hukm — what's the rule — for if you find a child, or if a child is in foster care, or the parents have given that child up, neglected that child, dropped it on the doorstep of the hospital? A mom is giving birth and gives it up. What's the hukm for a child like that? A child that doesn't have a parent, a child whose parents are unknown — they have a parent, but they're unknown?

The rule is — the hukm is — that child, are you ready for this? Even if found in a non-Muslim land, is a Muslim — provided one Muslim exists in that balad, in that land. Did you hear that? If one Muslim exists in that land, that child who's been given up, that child whose parents are nowhere to be found — the hukm is that that child, the deen that is associated with that child — that child is attributed, it has the nasab, the attribution, of the best deen in the balad. And if there's one Muslim in the land, then the deen of Islam reigns supreme, and the attribution is that that child is attributed to the deen of Islam — even if only one Muslim is there.

How many cases do we have like that? I used to be a social worker. I used to investigate child abuse cases. I used to work in foster homes. I used to go to hospitals where moms would deliver the baby — they'd be on drugs — and they'd give the child up and walk out of the hospital. I used to take those babies and put them in foster care. Those babies would have the hukm of a Muslim child, but there would be no Muslim family ready and available to take that child. Ponder that. Imagine that.

Ibn Khaldun on Violence to Children

Ibn Khaldun — the great Muslim alim. You read his Muqaddima. His work is absolutely phenomenal — known as the father of modern sociology. He did the most profound analysis of Muslim society. Ibn Khaldun has a chapter in his Muqaddima, near the end, in the sixth bab. His chapter is entitled: shidda — violence — to children. SubhanAllah. He's writing in the 9th or 10th century — Ibn Khaldun, medieval time, after the Mamluks. He has a chapter called shidda — which I'm translating as violence — to children, and its harm.

He says violence is done when you do something to a child. He's talking to them — he's addressing the teachers and the parents, literally the father. He says: when you do violence to a child — that's either doing something or not doing something, ya'ni abuse or neglect — he says: when you commit an act of violence to children and you repeat it, what happens is that the child begins to feel oppressed. Because of their feeling of oppression, Ibn Khaldun says, they start to feel lazy. They don't want to do things.

He says when this happens, they develop a new character because of the violence. He says their new character is that they learn to lie. And from this they are taught deceit and insincerity — to do things for a different reason — and hypocrisy. He says when this continues — look at this point — he says they lose their مَعَانِي الإِنْسَانِيَّة — their ma'ani insaniyya. He says what it means to be human. They lose their humanity. SubhanAllah.

You wonder why we have adults that are animals? It's because they lost their humanity as children. Do you want to know why we've got violent criminals? It's because they didn't have the care — because violence was done to them, either in the form of actual abuse or in the form of not having the right father, or a father. That's the profoundness of this.

He says when they lose their ma'ani insaniyya — when they lose what it means to be an insan — they develop, they get accustomed to bad characters. He says the meaning of them losing their insaniyya is that they don't develop good character anymore. They lose that and they develop bad character — not just develop bad character, they get used to it. And he says when they get used to it, they start to rely on living off of other people. Look at that. These kids grow up to be adults who are used to bad characteristics and they get accustomed to living off of other people — life of crime, stealing, living off the earnings of others.

So at the end he says: the advice to fathers and to teachers — don't be violent to children.

The Prophetic Model: Surah al-Duha

Did We not find you, O Prophet, as someone who didn't have a father? Didn't We find you like that — but We gave you shelter. فَآوَىٰ — literally, almost to bring someone in from the cold. Somebody is out there in the cold, in the rain — bring them in. And We found you searching, and We gave you this gem. And you didn't have anything, so We enriched you.

That's our job as men. That's our job as fathers. That's our job as husbands. That's our job as a community — to give shelter, to give a fostering environment to kids that don't have what they need to have.

So don't do violence to kids that don't have fathers. And don't be harsh — when these kids, or adults, these kids who didn't have, these adults who didn't have when they were kids, who grew up not having and still don't have — when they beg and they ask, don't be tough with them. They didn't have a father. You got Allah — they didn't have it. So don't be tough with them. Because these people grew up to affect society.

Those Who Were Raised Without Fathers But Transformed the World

Look in the worldly sense — material sense, dunya sense — at the people that were adopted, who didn't have dads, but then somebody took them in.

Look at Nelson Mandela. Nelson Mandela was an orphan. Did you know that? He was adopted. Somebody took him in.

Look at Bill Clinton. Bill Clinton was adopted.

Look at Steve Jobs. Brilliant example. Steve Jobs invented the iPhone, Apple. His father, by the way, was a Muslim. His biological father was a Syrian Muslim. His name is Abdel Fattah. He met a lady — non-Muslim. She became pregnant. Her parents didn't like the idea that the father was a Muslim. So they made her give up her child. And the child was adopted in the hospital by Paul and Clara Jobs, and they gave him the name Steve.

Jesse Jackson — he was adopted. Dave Thomas, the guy who founded Wendy's — he was adopted.

Look at pop culture. Look at the movies. Superman — he transformed society. He's an adopted kid, adopted by some parents in Kansas. Batman — same thing. Parents die. He's adopted. Taken care of. Spider-Man — same thing. Even in pop culture they're saying: look at what you do when these kids don't have a father but you take them in. They can transform society.

Examples From Our Own Turath

Look at our own turath. Musa, alayhi al-salam — he was adopted by Fir'awn, but still he was adopted. His father is not mentioned. His mother is mentioned, his father is not.

Yusuf, alayhi al-salam — absolutely adopted. He was without his father how many years? He was raised in the palace of the Aziz.

Isa, alayhi al-salam — of course without a father. No one would doubt his ability and his description as a transformational figure.

Muhammad, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam — don't need to speak anymore.

Imam al-Shafi'i. His father died. He was yatim. His mother traveled from Palestine to Mecca and put him in the hands of Muslim ibn Zinji, who was the Mufti of Mecca, who was from West Africa. She said: raise him as your son. Teach him everything that you know. And he said: I will do it. She said: what is your name, ya ghulam? Muhammad ibn Idrees, he said. He said: Come. Come. Five years later, Muslim ibn Zinji says: I've taught you everything I know. Now I will send you for higher education. Go to Medina and meet the alim of Medina — Malik ibn Anas. The rest is history.

Don't tell me that when you take a risk on a child, it doesn't pay off.

Our Responsibility as a Community

Brothers and sisters, we have a job to do. We have to establish Muslim foster homes. We have to take care of Muslim kids. We have to do a service for this society. And Allah will always help the servant as long as the servant helps his brother.

Ibad Allah, ittaqullah. Indeed, Allah commands justice, and benevolence, and giving to relatives, and He forbids immorality, and bad conduct, and oppression. He admonishes you, so that you may be mindful. Establish the prayer.