New Year Goal: Work on fixing yourself

The Cycle of Time

My dear brothers and sisters, what do we know about the cycle of time? Probably we know about the cycle of life, but the cycle of time — when the year goes around — what's the point of that? What's the purpose of this?

When Rasulullah ﷺ was on the minbar on Arafah, when he was speaking to the people during Hajj, what did he say to them? He said:

That the whole time cycle has now been reset — reset to the time when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala had created the heavens and the earth.

Why so? Because the Arabs back then used to change the months around depending on convenience. So when that time came for the Hajj, everything was reset back again to where it belongs.

There is a purpose for this. And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala mentioned that in Surah At-Tawbah for us. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala created this world, and He divided time into twelve months:

The number of months that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has divided time into is twelve. Four of these months are sacred months — of special virtue and special blessing. And we are in one of those months. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says: this is the true faith, the true deen of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Do not transgress against yourself. Do not waste those precious days and precious months.

The Prophet ﷺ explained that three of these months are continuous and back to back —

Three are continuous — Dhul Qa'dah, Dhul Hijjah, and Al-Muharram — and one separate, that is Rajab.

A New Hijri Year — What Is Your Plan?

Brothers and sisters, we are right now in a new Hijri year — 1445 Hijri. What are you planning to do? What's your purpose right now? What are you going to do this year? Are you planning to go to Hajj? How are you going to approach this Ramadan, insha'Allah? You have been given another chance, another calendar, to start planning — hopefully to do more khairat in your ibadah and your ta'ah, bismillah.

And if there is anything I would recommend for you and I — that we should focus on for this Hijri year — it is the purpose of this whole life: to worship Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala by bettering yourself. How can I fix my own self?

The Oath of Allah — Purify Your Inner Self

In Surah Ash-Shams, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala makes thirteen oaths — thirteen times He swears by the sun, by the moon, by the day, by the night. Thirteen times. And then He says:

Successful is the one who purifies himself — his inmost self. وَقَدْ خَابَ مَن دَسَّاهَا — and the one who ruins it is the one who is wicked, corrupt, and doomed.

So my purpose insha'Allah for this year: I would like to work on myself. How can I better myself from last year? And frankly, if you don't get better every single day, you are already falling behind. If you are not making a plan that every single day, every single Jumu'ah, I need to make some improvement in my personal life insha'Allah — then you are already falling behind.

Ibn Qudamah's Four Steps to Bettering Yourself

Imam Ibn Qudamah, may Allah have mercy on him, said there are four things you need to do in order to better yourself and improve yourself. I want to relate these four things to you so you can work on them this year insha'Allah. Make this your goal so that you can accomplish:

You become successful because you purify your inner self and avoid corrupting it. So what are these four things?

1. Find a Mentor

That you find a mentor, you find a shaykh, you find someone that you learn from. We live today in the culture of individuality. When it comes even to learning, it has become online — you are in control of your learning experience. For a very long time, our deen was taught to us through علماء صالحين أتقياء — people who would come and teach you from beginning to end. They teach you how to read Quran, how to worship Allah, how to become a good righteous person.

Today we go online. We listen to these videos, watch these videos, listen to these podcasts — which is all good, there is no doubt. But that doesn't give you that صُحْبَة — that companionship — by which you purify yourself.

The mother of Imam Malik, may Allah have mercy on him, when she used to send him to his teacher, she would say:

Make sure that you learn from his conduct, from his akhlaq, his manners — observe before you learn his knowledge.

So my dear brothers and sisters, this year I would like for you to find someone as a mentor from whom you can learn and have that sense of companionship insha'Allah.

2. Find a Righteous Friend

Find a peer, someone with whom you team up and you bond with on the path to Allah. Find a friend — a good friend. Someone بَصِير — someone with good insight. Someone who can add value to your life, not the opposite. Someone who can really benefit you in this dunya and in the akhirah.

In the hadith of Ibn Abbas, may Allah be pleased with him, Rasulullah ﷺ says:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 6498; Sahih Muslim, Book 44, Hadith 208)

People are just like a hundred camels. Out of all those hundred camels, you could barely find one suitable for a ride. Why was that important for them? Because that is the desert — your ride has to be strong and reliable enough to take you through that journey. Otherwise you are doomed. Similarly, this life is a journey — it is like a desert. I need someone who I can go with on that journey, who will be reliable and take me safely to Allah. They don't have to be a thousand people or a hundred people. One reliable friend who can bring you closer to Allah is extremely important.

Why? Because that friend will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Umar ibn al-Khattab, may Allah be pleased with him, said:

May Allah have mercy on someone who gifts us — who gives us the gift of our own uyub, our own shortcomings. Highlight my shortcomings for me. Don't hide them and just make me feel good all the time.

We live in a life that is all about feeling good. So even our friends lie to us — because they don't want to lose our friendship. But you need someone reliable who will tell you to your face: "You're wrong. You shouldn't be doing that. That's not befitting of you." I need a friend like this. Make sure to be in the right place so that you can find him insha'Allah.

3. Learn from Your Enemies

Learn from your foes and your enemies. You know when someone comes and starts talking about you — backbiting you, gossiping about you, or comes and spits their hate at you to your face? Be objective. Yes, they hate you. But — is it true? Is that really who I am?

SubhanAllah — maybe it is true. One time, Al-Hasan al-Basri, may Allah have mercy on him, heard somebody talking about him: "You're a hypocrite, you're a show-off, you're this, you're that." He responded: "You are the one who knows me best. Thank you for telling me to my face." Because sometimes we get deceived by so much praise and being told that we are good and wonderful — and we lose the real sense of who we actually are.

So sometimes you are going to have to learn from your enemies. Sometimes your enemies are gifts from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to put you in your place. Instead of agonizing — "How am I going to retaliate? How am I going to get back at them?" — it is a gift being given to you. Maybe this person is telling the truth about who you are. It puts you in your right place insha'Allah.

4. Intermingle with People

Intermingle with people. Do not isolate yourself and live in your own bubble, thinking the world is masha'Allah perfect and amazing. Because when you intermingle with people, live with people, you will see what you don't like — and you avoid it. When you live among the people, you will see and hear things you don't like, and you realize: that is a bad trait, that is not good to do, that is not something I would want to do.

But what is your standard in order to know what is right and what is wrong? You go back to the Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ — he was the best model. If Allah dislikes something, I am going to dislike it if I see it among the people. And if Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala likes something, I will like it among the people, and I will be promoting it as well.

Where to Start: Three Foundations of Self-Reform

So those are four things you need to do in order to better yourself. And now — where do I start? Imam Ibn Qudamah says: start from these three things.

1. Islah al-Qalb — Fixing the Heart

Worry about your heart. Don't worry about what you said, what you did, or what people say about what you said and did. Worry about your heart. Because if your heart is good, everything is going to be good. As the Prophet ﷺ said in the hadith:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 52; Sahih Muslim, Book 22, Hadith 107)

In this body there is a piece of flesh. If it is good, everything goes good. And if it is bad, everything goes bad with it. It is the heart.

So work on your heart. This year, I would like to practice the ibadah — the worship of the heart. To have consciousness of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. To feel awe before Allah for His sake. Remove ill feelings from the heart — envy, hostility, all of these things. Take them out. And fill it with goodness.

2. Amend Your Behavior and Actions

Look at what you see, what you hear, what you do — and refine it. Because everything registers. Make sure that when you meet Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, your record of deeds is good. You need to refine your behavior, your akhlaq, your manners, your deeds. As Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says in the Quran:

Those who truly fear their position before Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and restrain themselves from the hawa — the desires — those are the people who enter Jannah. May Allah make us among the people of Jannah.

3. Islah al-Nas — Help Amend the People Around You

You become good, and part of your goodness is sharing that khair. Look around at your friends, your people, your family and say: "Look, you are not supposed to be doing this." The nafs has that sense of vengeance — you always want to fight, win, and be superior. You don't want to be defeated. But who cares? If your dunya victory is going to come at the cost of your triumph with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala — then give people the dunya victory. It is fine. If it grants you triumph with Allah, give it to them.

So it is very important that we share the khair with the people insha'Allah.

Remember — work on your heart first and foremost. Number two, work on your manners, your akhlaq, your etiquette, your behavior, and your actions. And number three, share the khair with the people. That will guarantee you insha'Allah a good self-consciousness and islah for your nafs insha'Allah. May Allah make us among those who do islah for their nafs, ya Rabb al-'alamin.

I say this and ask Allah's forgiveness for me and for you. Ask His forgiveness — indeed, He is the Forgiving, the Merciful.

The Second Khutbah: The Virtues of Al-Muharram and Ashura

Alhamdulillah, rabbil 'alamin. Peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and his family and his companions.

My dear brothers and sisters, we are in the month of Al-Muharram. Al-Muharram is the first month of the lunar calendar — and that was by the selection of Amir al-Mu'minin 'Umar ibn al-Khattab, may Allah be pleased with him and please him.

However, this month has virtue as the Prophet ﷺ mentioned — that these four sacred months are ones in which good deeds are encouraged. In Al-Muharram particularly, the Prophet ﷺ mentioned in the hadith — when he was asked: "What is the best fast after Ramadan, ya Rasulallah?" — he said:

(Sahih Muslim, Book 13, Hadith 202)

The month of Al-Muharram. Now some of the ulama say this refers to all four sacred months, and some say it refers specifically to the actual month of Al-Muharram. However, the Prophet ﷺ never fasted an entire month other than Ramadan. So if you would like to fast, I encourage you. I know you might say it is hot this year and it would be difficult. But the more hardship we endure in the process, the more reward we get insha'Allah wa tabarakah. May Allah make it easy on all of you, Rabb al-'alamin.

And if you are unable to fast the whole month or most of it, then at least do not forget to fast the tenth of Al-Muharram — Ashura.

When the Prophet ﷺ first arrived in Madinah, he saw the Jewish community fasting that day. He asked: "What is that for?" They said: "That is the day when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala rescued Musa from Fir'awn. So we fast this day as gratitude to Allah who gave victory to our Prophet Musa, may peace be upon him." So the Prophet ﷺ said: "I have more right to Musa than you do." Then he ordered the Muslim community in Madinah to fast the tenth of Al-Muharram. And then he said: "If Allah gives me the ability to fast next year, I will fast the ninth and the tenth."

So if you can fast the ninth and the tenth, that would be great. This is going to be insha'Allah next Friday — next Friday is the tenth, so you can fast Thursday and Friday insha'Allah.

What will you get for fasting that day? The Prophet ﷺ said about the virtue of Ashura:

(Sahih Muslim, Book 13, Hadith 197)

It will expiate the sins committed in the past year. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala forgive us our sins, ya Rabb al-'alamin.

So make the effort — starting with your islah al-nafs, fixing yourself — by starting that commitment to khair for this year. Make the commitment to do better this year, so that by next year insha'Allah you look back and say: "Alhamdulillah, Rabb al-'alamin — I think I did a better job." May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala make us among those who always improve in their iman, ya Rabb al-'alamin, and in the practice of the deen, ya Rabb al-'alamin.