The Prophet's Compassionate Wisdom

The Prophet's Compassionate Wisdom

All praise is due to Allah and his praise and blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم, his family, his companions and his followers until the day of judgment. I bear witness that Allah is the only one worthy of worship. Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم is his last and final messenger.

The Story of Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul

It was in the beginning of the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم time in Medina. He had not been there long, and Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم in the beginning of his years in Medina was trying his best to establish a strong community, strong foundations for the Muslims, as the Muslim state would grow over the years. He was going to visit Sa'd ibn Ubadah, the master, one of the leaders of the Al-Khazraj tribe.

As you know, Medina was made of mainly two big tribes among the Arabs — Al-Aws and Al-Khazraj. So he was going to visit Sa'd ibn Ubadah, then he was told about one of the leaders of Al-Khazraj, another leader from this tribe, whose name was Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul, who would be known later on as the head of the hypocrites. But this man at that point was not even Muslim yet, or had not declared his Islam.

He was still a pagan, worshipping idols. So the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم changed his direction to stop by the gathering where Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul was sitting. Among the people sitting with him were Muslims, and among them Jews and people from Medina who were pagans — not Muslims. It was a mixed gathering.

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم came to give them salam and to sit with them. When the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم approached them and Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul saw him coming — and Medina, for those who don't know, the land was barren, it's dust, stirred easily by footsteps — so as Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم came, him and whoever was in his company, the dust rose. So Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul covered his nose and covered his face and said, "Don't raise dust on us, Ya Muhammad." And he said, "The smell of your donkey has bothered us — it stinks."

That is how he welcomed the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. You can see how rude he was. That is not how Arabs are known to be when they are with their guests. They are known to be hospitable — they like people to come to them, to host people, to welcome people, to offer food. But he was very hostile toward the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم.

The Recitation and the Confrontation

Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم passed by and came down and sat with the group. He صلى الله عليه وسلم started reciting Quran for them — reciting to them what Allah had revealed to him. And you can imagine the beautiful recitation of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, with people listening to the Quran, their hearts moved by these words.

Then all of a sudden, with an even ruder manner, Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul said:

"What a beautiful thing you say — if only what you're saying were true, if it's really from God." He was raising doubts. He didn't say it was not from God — he could not refute it because the Quran is perfect. So he could do nothing but raise a question mark. He said, "That's the best thing ever heard. And if it were true from God" — then he said, "But you know what? Don't bring it to our gathering. If you want, stay at your home. And whoever wishes to hear this beautiful talk of yours, they will come to you. But don't bring it to us."

When he said that, Abdullah ibn Rawaha, one of the companions, became angry and said:

"Dear Rasulullah, don't worry about it. We love to hear the Quran. Come and recite Quran for us — when you see us gathered, come to us, Ya Rasulullah." Then another man from Al-Ansar, from the Sahaba, said:

"By Allah, the smell of the Prophet's donkey is better than you, Ya Abdullah ibn Ubayy." And with this, since Abdullah ibn Ubayy had his followers, they said, "How can you say this?" Anyway, a fight broke out. Voices were raised, then hands were used and they started fighting — the Muslims, the Jews, the pagans, the Ansar, the Khazraj, the Aws — the whole thing became a mess.

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم calmed everybody down — he came into the middle and broke up the fight — until they calmed down and the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم left.

The Visit to Sa'd ibn Ubadah

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم then went to Sa'd ibn Ubadah — essentially the head of Al-Khazraj — to tell him what had happened. And look at how the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم told him. He said:

"Did you hear what Abu al-Hubab said?" He gave him the nickname Abu al-Hubab, which is a very respectful way of referring to him. And I should mention — what Abdullah ibn Ubayy had actually said to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was:

"Hey, you man — don't bring this speech to our gatherings." He addressed him as "hey man" — like that. Yet the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, in this man's absence, referred to him by his respectful nickname Abu al-Hubab — the respectful way of addressing him.

Then Sa'd ibn Ubadah said:

"Ya Rasulullah, forgive him and pardon him. I swear by the One who sent you the Book — before you arrived in Medina, the people of Medina had collectively agreed to elect him as their king. The whole community of Medina — the Khazraj, the Ansar, all the tribes, the Jews, the pagans — all of them agreed to elect him and crown him as king of Medina."

"We were in the final stage, putting the gems and stones on the crown — it was almost ready. Then when you came, everything fell apart. The whole thing changed. Because the two main tribes became Muslim, the community entered Islam, and you, Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم, came. So, Ya Rasulullah, please forgive him. Because of this, he carries all this envy and jealousy and hatred. He feels so angry at you and at Islam. But just be patient with him."

And Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم was patient with him.

The Battle of Badr and the Emergence of Hypocrisy

Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul did not know how things would go with Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم and Medina yet. So he also did not declare himself Muslim, nor did he openly oppose Islam. He simply watched — until the battle of Badr came. When the battle of Badr came, Abdullah ibn Ubayy thought that would be the end — the Muslims would be defeated because their numbers were small, and the Meccan knights were coming with full force. It would be the end of Islam and the end of Muslims.

But all of a sudden, Allah made things flip. The Muslims won that battle. The leaders of Quraysh were killed in the battlefield, and Islam became as strong as it had ever been. That made Abdullah ibn Ubayy say to himself: this religion is not going anywhere. So he began to recalculate his position and how to deal with Islam. But instead of accepting Islam, he decided to declare openly that he was Muslim — while in his heart, he never truly accepted the religion. He only accepted it outwardly to protect himself, his family, and his status in his tribe. But he never really believed in Islam.

And since then, he began plotting against the Muslims and against the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم throughout history — when he pulled back one third of the Muslim army in the battle of Uhud to create a fracture in the Muslim ranks; when he told his people not to support the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم financially:

And when he said:

"When we return to Medina, the mightier will expel the weaker from it" — meaning, "we are the leaders, this city belongs to us; these immigrants don't belong here." That was the kind of language he had. And then the worst of the worst — when he spread the rumor about Aisha رضي الله عنها, the Prophet's wife, which hurt the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم the most.

And in the day of Al-Ahzab, when some said:

"Muhammad has been promising you all this safety and prosperity — nothing. His promise is all empty." And I could go on and on with this long list of things he did throughout his life — until he saw the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم conquer Mecca and the Arabs entering Islam in droves. And yet he did not change his animosity one bit. And yet the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم continued to forgive, continued to accommodate.

The Death of Abdullah ibn Ubayy and the Prophet's Response

Until the last moment — when Abdullah ibn Ubayy died, his son Abdullah came to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and said, "Ya Rasulullah, my father — I know all that he's done — but Ya Rasulullah, at least if you could give me your burda," — the Prophet's robe — "so I can shroud him with it when I put him in his grave." And the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, "No problem, take it."

And this shows you — those people who always say, "the blessings of the Prophet's staff or hair or whatever" — if you're a good Muslim, it will benefit you; and if you're a bad person, it will not benefit you. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم gave him his own robe, but it was not going to benefit him in the akhira. So the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم gave him his robe.

Not only that — when the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم prepared to pray the salatul janazah on him, Umar came and grabbed the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, objecting and saying, "Ya Rasulullah, you are going to pray on him after all that he's done?" And the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم smiled and said:

"Step aside from me, O Umar." And Umar pressed him by Allah, saying, "You pray on him, and Allah has forbidden you to do so?" He kept arguing with the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم not to pray on him. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم replied, "Allah has given me the choice — to make istighfar or not — and I choose to do so."

And the reference to this is the verse:

Not only that — the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم made the salatul janazah very long:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 1269; Sahih Muslim, Book 32, Hadith 6254)

"Never had the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم made a janazah prayer so long as he made for Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul." And when he was carried out and before he was buried, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم looked at his face and even blew upon him — so some of the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم breath and saliva were on the face of Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul. The last things he left this dunya with were the robe of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم saliva on his face. Yet he is the head of hypocrisy, and he is in hellfire. And that was a lesson to show you that what will judge you is your actions — nothing else.

Lessons from the Prophet's Wisdom

Openness and Engagement with Society

Before I go on, I want to say — I am very impressed by the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم wisdom and the way he dealt with things. First of all, look at how the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, when he passed by the group of Muslims and non-Muslims — with the Jews — all sitting together, socializing and talking. You know, Muslims never felt threatened by being open to sitting with others, socializing with others. Actually, it's the other way around. They said, "Ya Rasulullah, don't come to our gathering. We don't want to listen to the Quran. We don't want you here."

Isolation has never been the attitude of Muslims. Muslims throughout history were open. We are not exclusive — they were inclusive. They always wanted to be part of society at large. It is the other side that said, "Don't listen to this Quran. Don't listen to those people." So I don't know why so many times we feel as if we have a religion or a culture that we're afraid will not stand up to the challenges of modern times. So we try to hide our status, stay shy about declaring who we are and what we believe in, and be part of society as if we have nothing to contribute. But the reality — the matter of fact — is that we have so much to contribute as Muslims and as a community.

Maintaining Standards of Moral Excellence

I love how the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم always kept his standard in dealing with people. We do not lower our standard of morality. This man was rude — he did not know the proper etiquette of addressing people. But the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم did not address him in kind. As a matter of fact, he kept his standard. When he referred to him, he referred to him in the way that someone like him deserves — in a respectful manner. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, when the fight broke out, did not take the side of the Muslims against the others to make things worse. No — the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم tried to calm everybody down.

Understanding Envy

I love how Sa'd ibn Ubadah put his finger on the key point — that this man's hatred and rejection of Islam and of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم did not come from what he believed the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was doing wrong. No, it came from envy. And I want you to remember this as you leave the khutbah today:

The people who envy you, they don't envy you because they want to be like you. They want you to be like them. They don't want to go up to your level — they want to drag you down to their level. That is the reality of the envious person. So it is hard to deal with people who are filled with this envy and hatred. And the best way is to keep the space, to avoid the confrontation.

Wisdom Over Reaction — Winning the Many, Not Just the One

In the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم experience, one of the worst enemies he ever dealt with was the animosity of this man. You can see it through history — when he pulled back one third of the Muslim army in the battle of Uhud to create vacancies and fractures in the Muslim ranks; when he spread the rumor about Aisha رضي الله عنها, which hurt the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم the most. And the list goes on.

If you consider his actions — his betrayal of the Muslims, giving the Muslim army's secrets to the enemy, opening Medina to the enemy to attack from the back, what he accused Aisha of — any one of these things was enough not only to expel him but to execute him. And indeed, any betrayal and espionage — giving the secrets of one's country to the enemy — that was sufficient cause. But the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, "Leave him."

He knew that this man was a leader of his people, and he knew that treating him with wisdom and compassion was not about winning him — it was about winning the people. He is one of them. He knew that if he punished or killed him, people would always talk about the execution itself — not why he was executed, not what he had done. They would say that Muhammad kills his own followers. "I don't want people to say that Muhammad is killing his followers." No. Sometimes we need that wisdom. We need to resist the temptation to win a point but lose a war, or lose a person. Sometimes resisting the urge to make a point makes you win many more points.

Having wisdom and seeing the long-term outcome is something so clear in the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم way of dealing with people.

Second Part of the Khutbah

All praise belongs to Allah for His mercy, and prayers and peace be upon him after whom there is no prophet.

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم later told Umar ibn al-Khattab: "If I had killed Abdullah ibn Ubayy ibn Salul that day when you asked me to, people from his followers would have stood up to defend him. But now, no one even cares about him and nobody will defend him. And it reached a point where, if I asked his own people to deal with him, they would — because it has become so clear to them what he truly was."

What was Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم teaching Umar? This great lesson: that those who were standing for Abdullah ibn Ubayy turned against him — because the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was patient, wise, and showed compassion with firmness.

This concept of understanding advantage and disadvantage — what to say and how to say it and when to say it — is something essential for success in life in general. And the more you read from the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم stories and life, the wiser you become — as a person, as a father, as a leader, as an employee or employer, as a member of your community and your society.

We ask Allah to make us always among those who are wise in their actions. We ask Allah to give us wisdom. We ask Allah to give us knowledge and patience and hikmah. We ask Allah to give us the best of manners. And we ask Allah to forgive us, our parents, and all the Muslims.