The True Meaning of Being Grateful

The True Meaning of Being Grateful

I seek refuge with Allah from the evil of our souls and the evil of our deeds. Whomsoever Allah guides, none can misguide him, and whosoever He leads astray, none can guide him. And I bear witness that there is no god but Allah, alone, with no partner.

And I bear witness that Muhammad is His servant and Messenger. O you who have believed, fear Allah as He should be feared, and do not die except as Muslims. O you who have believed, fear your Lord, Who created you from one soul, and created from it a wife, and spread among them many men and women. And fear Allah, to whom you ask one another, and the wombs. Verily, Allah is ever watching over you. O you who have believed, fear Allah, and speak the truth. Your deeds will be corrected, and your sins will be forgiven. And whosoever obeys Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed attained a great triumph.

Know, O servants of Allah, that the best speech is the speech of Allah, the Exalted. And the best guide is Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him. And the worst of things are their innovations, and every innovation is a bid'ah, and every bid'ah is a misguidance, and every misguidance is in the Fire.

Gratitude Is a Daily Obligation for the Believer

People have different reasons for that. But for the believer, for a Muslim, there is no one day or one part of the year that is designated for something like this. As a Muslim, you know and you believe that being grateful is part of your deen. And it's part of every single day, if not even every single breath of your life, to be grateful. To be grateful to Allah. Be grateful for the blessings that you have around you. Be grateful for the family that Allah blessed you with. Being grateful for many, many, many things.

Brothers and sisters, being grateful is extremely important for a believer. I want to explain to you why this is so important. Because without it, we're going to get lost. Especially in a time when, سبحان الله, trials and difficulties and hardships arise, and people will start thinking negatively. And when you think negatively, you're going to completely overlook all the blessings you need to be grateful for. And without having that positive outlook at the good things you've been blessed with, سبحان الله, people become depressed. And become now psychologically actually trapped into this feeling. Without being grateful to Allah for the blessings that you have, you're going to feel lost in a dark space in this world.

By Default, We Are Not Grateful

So what does it mean to be grateful for Muslims? And how do you understand that? The first thing we need to understand about us as human beings is that, by nature — or I could say, by default — we're not grateful. By default, you're not grateful. So what does that mean? It's not by nature that you're grateful. It's by character. It's a choice you make to be grateful.

Because Allah said that at the very beginning of Surah Al-Insan:

Does this insan even remember? Do you even know? Do you remember? When you've been nothing before you became a human being, before you became who you are — لَمْ يَكُن شَيْئًا مَّذْكُورًا — you've been nothing. And then He said:

We create this insan from what? From mixed fluids. To try them, to test them. As part of the plan, the divine plan of Allah. He said, نَّبْتَلِيهِ فَجَعَلْنَاهُ سَمِيعًا بَصِيرًا — and We gave them the instruments and the tools by which this test will be valid for them and good for them. Then He said:

We showed them the way. We guided them. Whether they choose to be grateful or ungrateful. The translation doesn't give the meaning of شَاكِرًا or كَفُورًا properly. Why? Because in the Arabic language, Allah says إِمَّا شَاكِرًا, which means some of them will choose to be grateful. وَإِمَّا كَفُورًا — the expression كَفُور, the fa'ool form in the Arabic language, means excessively ungrateful. So what does that mean? It means the majority of the people will not be grateful.

And Allah has affirmed this in the Quran as well:

And few among My servants who are truly grateful. He used كَفُور and شَكُور there. But when He spoke about the default state of insan, we are less grateful. So among the few who are grateful, there are even fewer who are truly grateful.

Ingratitude: The Plot of Shaytan

Brothers and sisters, denying Allah — not admitting His favors upon you — all of this is a major sin. As a matter of fact, that is the plotting of the Shaytan. Didn't the Shaytan say to Allah when he challenged Him, "O my Lord, just let me live until the end of time. I'll prove it to you":

I promise you, I will attack them — from behind them, from in front of them, from the right side, from the left side. I'll leave no place for them. وَلَا تَجِدُ أَكْثَرَهُمْ شَاكِرِينَ — and you will not find the majority to be grateful to You. Which means the majority will not be grateful to You. That's the plotting of the Shaytan.

And Allah, my dear brothers and sisters, reminded us of the danger of being ungrateful over and over and over again, many many times, in the surah we all love to listen to because it sounds beautiful. But do we even understand the meaning of that warning and that threat?

He says, which of the favors of your Lord would you deny? Almost after every ayah in Surah Ar-Rahman, Allah is reminding us — you will deny Me. You will. You will reject My favors upon you. You will forget about these favors that Allah blessed you with. He says that multiple times. Which of the favors of your Lord are you going to deny?

What does that mean, my dear brothers and sisters? As much as we try to be grateful, we still overlook a lot of blessings. When something happens to us, we forget. And we go back again to being ungrateful. As Allah says about us:

He says, look, I have given you the earth. I have given you all the blessings of this earth. I give you life here. And then He says, قَلِيلًا مَّا تَشْكُرُونَ — but you're not so grateful. Little or seldom that you give gratitude to Allah.

How to Show Gratitude: The Heart

Brothers and sisters, being grateful is a matter of character. It's not just a matter of nature, as we understand from all of this. So if you want to be grateful to Allah, what does that exactly even mean? You need to be consciously thinking of being grateful to Allah. Showing your gratitude to Allah needs to be on a regular basis. That's what it means.

So how can we do this? See, when it comes to showing gratitude, first of all, you have to understand you're doing it in different ways. There's the verbal and the non-verbal. The non-verbal way to show gratitude to Allah is through what, O jama'ah? Through your heart. This heart — where Allah gives you a blessing, are you content with it? Do you feel in your heart that you're happy with what Allah blessed you with?

Even if Allah chose to test one of us — may Allah protect us from any trials, ya Rabb al-'alamin — but if we go through tests and trials, how do we receive that? People have different levels on how to receive the trials from Allah.

Imam Ibn al-Qayyim's Four Levels in the Face of Trials

Imam Ibn al-Qayyim, rahimahu Allah, divided them into categories. Because in the face of trials, some people choose the path of tasa'khut — they start whining and crying and going out and complaining, and they leave nobody but to complain about Allah and about what they're going through. This is muharram. That is unacceptable. It's unacceptable. It's prohibited.

The second, he said, some of us show sabr — patience. What does it mean to show patience? Meaning, I'm not going to say anything bad. I'm not going to do anything bad. But you know what, I don't like it. In my heart, I despise it. I don't like it. That's okay. As long as you don't say anything, you should be fine. You're safe at least.

The third category, he says, is maqam ar-rida — when you have that satisfaction in your heart. You're not just accepting it, no — you're also satisfied. Allah chose this for me. I don't understand the wisdom, but I know Allah knows better for me. So I'm satisfied with that.

But then what is better than that? He says, maqam al-shukr — when you get to the level of gratitude. Where you even see a great power of Allah, a great blessing of Allah, being given to you even through these trials. Like you look at the big picture. Not at one pixel of your life — no, the whole thing. Being part of this makes you feel more satisfied and willing to give gratitude, because Allah chose you to go through this trial — maybe for something better for you.

Who can reach that level of understanding of Allah's trials, Allah's wisdom, and your ability and capability of being grateful in a moment like this? We can barely be grateful when things are good. Imagine being grateful when things are not so good.

Brothers and sisters, the heart is the most important thing. You can maybe say Alhamdulillah, but does your heart comply with that? When you say "I thank Allah for things," is your heart really complying with that? And I mention this many many times and I still hear it from people. Whenever you ask them, "How are you doing?" they say, "I cannot complain." I say — you already complained. When you say "Alhamdulillah, I cannot complain" or "it could be better," you already complained. Just say Alhamdulillah and be satisfied with that.

That's the highest level. But it requires a lot of training. A lot of exercise. Failures here and there, but at the end, you will get there, insha'Allah. Once someone tells you "how are you doing?" say, "Alhamdulillah, so many blessings." And you will say it with joy, even though you have nothing. Because you know that if Allah chose to put you through this, He has wisdom. And I'm going to go with Allah's plan for me. That's the absolute submission.

How to Show Gratitude: The Tongue

Brothers and sisters, the other form of gratitude is with the tongue. When you say Alhamdulillah, Ashkurullah. Every time you remember, say Alhamdulillah. We say Alhamdulillah whether we're going through something good or something hard or a hardship. We always say Alhamdulillah. Why? What does it mean when you say Alhamdulillah?

Alhamdulillah is praising Allah for His absolute perfect qualities and attributes. That's the meaning of Alhamdulillah. Saying subhanAllah is you freeing Allah from any faults or flaws in His qualities. So saying Alhamdulillah is affirming His perfect qualities. So when you say Alhamdulillah in the face of a trial, what exactly are you saying? I say Alhamdulillah — I thank Allah, the most perfect — meaning, even what I'm going through, even though I see it to be hard or difficult or a trial, I know He is the most perfect, He is the most merciful. That's part of His rahma probably — His mercy — that I have to go through this. Part of His wisdom that I have to go through this. Because I know He is all perfect. So you say it, my dear brothers and sisters, with that understanding.

How to Show Gratitude: Using Allah's Blessings in His Service

Another form of showing gratitude to Allah is using the blessings He bestowed upon you for His service. Why did He give you sight? Why did He give you wealth? Why did He give you health? Why did He give you time — free, that you have nothing to do with it? What do you do? What do you do with these things? And if you're not utilizing them to show your gratitude to Allah, you will regret it when you lose that opportunity.

Then the Prophet ﷺ says:

(Reported by al-Hakim in al-Mustadrak, and al-Bayhaqi in Shu'ab al-Iman; also narrated in Musnad Imam Ahmad)

Make sure you benefit from five things before five things catch up with you: your youth before you get old, when you're healthy before you get sick, when you're wealthy before you become poor — and all these other things. Basically, utilize these blessings before they're taken away from you. Because Allah says He's going to test you. And part of His test is taking some of these ni'mah, some of these blessings, to see how you're going to react.

Why Do People Refuse to Be Grateful?

So brothers and sisters, there are many ways to show gratitude to Allah. But definitely, being grateful shows that Alhamdulillah positive outlook on this world. Now the question many people ask: why do people refuse to be grateful? What prevents us from being grateful?

The ultimate answer to this lies in the fact that, as human beings, we do not like to be in debt to anybody. You don't like to be in debt to anybody. You don't like anybody to have a favor over you. Because if they have a favor on you, what does that mean to you? I owe them something. You're obliged to submit to them, or maybe be kind to them — you always feel that kind of debt that you have to repay. That's why sometimes we deny the most obvious things, like from your spouse, your parents, your children. You owe each other a lot, jama'ah. Just being part of your life, you owe them that part as well. But we always deny it — we don't want to be grateful towards one another.

Now you can imagine how this applies to Allah. Some people, so arrogantly, don't want to believe in Allah, so they reject all these favors. They don't want to accept that what they have in their hand all came from Allah, so they deny Him completely and remain ungrateful. Which is why again, being grateful is a matter of character. It's a matter of choice. It's not a matter of nature.

So make sure that you work on this — refine your character of gratitude. Be grateful. Be grateful on a daily basis. Think of the blessings Allah has bestowed upon you, and there are so many you can't even enumerate:

If you try to enumerate and count the blessings of Allah, you will never be able to count them.

May Allah make us among those who are grateful to Him. May Allah bring our hearts to be grateful. May we show our gratitude to Allah. We ask Allah to give us the ability to be among the shakireen, O Lord of all the worlds.

Second Khutbah: Be Grateful to the People Around You

All praise be to Allah, Lord of all the worlds. May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his family, his companions, and all those who follow him.

My dear brothers and sisters, one last thing I want to mention about being grateful. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ mentioned in a hadith:

(Musnad Imam Ahmad, Hadith 7939; also narrated in Sunan Abu Dawud, Hadith 4811, and Jami' at-Tirmidhi, Hadith 1954)

If you don't show your gratitude to the people, you won't show your gratitude to Allah. What does that even mean? When Allah says هُوَ الرَّزَّاقُ — He is the one who sends the rizq, the provision, to you. He is الْجَوَّادُ الْكَرِيمُ — the most generous — who sends all these blessings to you. He is sending them through people. He is sending them through others around you.

When you get the health and the wealth and the employment, and Allah gives you sakinah — tranquility — with your family, with your parents, with your spouse, all these things are blessings coming from Allah. He is utilizing the people to deliver them to you. So therefore, it is extremely important to show our gratitude to Allah by being grateful to the people around us.

It's hard to admit your gratitude to a human being. Again, it makes you feel so much in debt to them. But it's okay. It's okay to admit their virtue and the blessing that Allah gave you through them. Having, Alhamdulillah, a good family, a good job, good health Alhamdulillah, good time that you spend in your life — all these things. It's okay to admit that to others and be grateful to them.

So make sure, before you leave insha'Allah, send your gratitude to somebody. Meet someone, show them your gratitude insha'Allah. Send them a text message. Say, "Look, I haven't actually been saying JazakAllah khair, but I want to make sure that I deliver that message to you," insha'Allah. Whoever that person is — make sure to be grateful.

BarakAllahu feekum.