Abdul Rahman Chao

As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu. I bear witness that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah. I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah. We praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

We seek his help and we seek his forgiveness. And we seek refuge in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala from the sins and from the evil that resides within us and from the evil that results from our sins. Whomsoever Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala guides, none shall misguide.

And whomsoever Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala allows to be led astray, then none shall guide them back to the straight path. I bear witness that there is no God worthy of worship except Allah and I bear witness that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is His Messenger. Allah tells us in the Qur'an, O you who believe, fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims.

O mankind, fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for He has created you from one nafs, from one soul and from it He has created its mate and from it many men and many women. And fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala by the rights that you ask of one another and by the rights through the wombs that have borne you. Verily, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is ever watchful over you.

O you who believe, fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, be God conscious and speak the truth. He will render your deeds righteous and He will forgive your sins and whoever obeys Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and His Messenger has achieved a great victory. Verily, the best speech is the speech of Allah and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and the worst affairs are those that are innovated in the religion for all of that is misguidance, all misguidance leads to hell.

A Lesson on True Worth

On the authority of Sahl bin Sa'ad, a companion of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was one time sitting with his companions, a man passed by in front of them. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said ما تقولون في هذا What do you say about this person? And then they said, the companion said حري إن خطب أن ينكح وإن تكلم أن يسمع وإن شفع أن يشفع This person, if he sought the marriage of any woman, he would be married, he would be given. And if he speaks, they listen to him. And if he intercedes, his intercession would be accepted.

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 6447)

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he didn't say anything. And then another man passed by another time and he said, وما تقولون في هذا And what do you say about this person? And he said, and they said Messenger of Allah إن خطب حري إن خطب ألا ينكح وإن تكلم ألا يسمع وإن شفع ألا يشفع That if he sought the hand in marriage of some woman, he could never be married, no one is going to accept him. And if he speaks, no one listens. And if he intercedes, his intercession is not accepted.

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 6447)

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in the narration, he said And by the one who possesses my soul in his hands. This second person, this second man that you said was pretty much in their terms a loser, he is better in the eyes of Allah. He is more beloved than if the whole world was filled with the likes of the first person.

Beyond Appearances

Brothers and sisters, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is not here just making comments about people. He is trying to teach his companions about an important concept of two different men. And that our perceived judgments of these people are not always true. We look at someone, we look at the way how they dress, we look at the car they have, we think about, ah, they live in such and such subdivision in such and such neighborhood and we make conclusions in our head that so and so must be successful or so and so must be otherwise.

And this hadith, brothers and sisters, really teaches us about a concept that is lost and that is the art of manliness. And for the sisters that are here, you might say, well, you know, this doesn't really apply to me. Because this is not only speaking to men, but this also applies to sisters as well.

But more importantly, sister, if you're not married, this is what you want to look for in your husband, in your future husband, inshallah. And if you are married, sister, then make sure you tell this to your husband. And I really believe that this concept of the art of manliness in Islam, we can benefit from it because you will be a better husband to your wife. You will be a better son to your mother. You will be a better father to your daughter. And you will be a better brother to the sisters.

Physical Strength is Not Everything

Brothers and sisters, let's look at the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. When you look in the Siyar and when you look in the Shama'il, you find that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, despite, as the ulama said, that he was the best man ever created, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was not extremely huge and tall. He was not so physically muscular and large. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was of medium height.

And Imam al-Tirmidhi, he narrates, that he was actually slightly higher than the average person, taller than the average person, but the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam didn't stand out from the rest of the people. And yes, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was given the miracle of the strength of 40 men. But that's because that's a miracle from Allah. And so, physical stature, whether you can bench-press 300 pounds or whether you can't bench-press 45 pounds, just the bar alone, that doesn't define your masculinity.

We look in the story of Dawud alayhi as-salam and the story of his counterpart, Jalut, Goliath. Jalut was this big, towering individual. And David was small and skinny and not too big, but yet Allah willed that he would defeat this big thing called Goliath.

So stature is not what makes you more of a man. You have a six-pack, mashallah, good for you. I have a one-pack, that doesn't make me less.

(Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2664)

During the time of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Abdullah ibn Mas'ud, and by the way, brothers, I'm not saying that you shouldn't be physically fit. I'm not saying that. You should be physically fit. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, The Muslim that is physically strong and healthy is beloved to Allah than the one that is weak. Of course. But what I'm saying is, don't think that because, mashallah, you can bench-press 800 pounds, that you are a rajaal now. That you are, mashallah, stud, fahl al-fuhool, you know? That everyone just wants to look up at you and be like, wow.

During the time of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Abdullah ibn Mas'ud was one time climbing a tree. And Abdullah ibn Mas'ud was not very muscular and large. He went up to the tree to grab a branch from the, like a miswak. And the wind came and blew. And some of his legs were exposed. And some of the companions started laughing. من دقة ساقيه From how small his legs were.

And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, مما تضحكون What are you laughing about? They said, يا نبي الله من دقة ساقيه Oh, Messenger of Allah, because look at his legs. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says, In the eyes of Allah, those two legs are heavier in the eyes of Allah than the mountain of Uhud.

True Nobility Comes from Character

In another narration, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam tells us that manliness is not something about how you appear. It's not how you dress, specifically. Although, إِنَّ اللَّهَ جَمِيلٌ يُحِبُّ الْجَمَال Allah is beautiful and He loves beauty.

And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, in another narration, he looked at Abu Dharr al-Ghifari and he said, اِرْفَعْ بَصَرَكْ Raise your eyesight and look in the masjid. Who do you think is the most noble here? And he said, that one. And this person was decked out in his finery and his mashallah and all the things on him looking so amazing.

And then the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam didn't say anything and he said to him, Now tell me who do you think in this masjid looks the most ignoble? And he pointed to this person that wasn't dressed as nice. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, This person is still better than the other person.

So it's not just about your appearances. Brothers and sisters, we know in Surah Kahf about the story of the two men who were blessed with gardens between them. Right? And one of them would say to the other, اَنَا أَكْثَرُ مِن كَمَالًا وَأَعَزُّ نَفَرًا I have more money than you and I have more men on my side.

And the other man later on in the conversation if you read, he says, You see that I have less wealth and less children than you. And so what does this mean? That society has its way of planting preconceived notions in our head of what makes a person appear to be successful. And so that is why brothers and sisters, let us examine in the second khutbah about the life of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and what he taught us of what it means to practice the art of manliness from his life sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

أقول قولي هذا وأستغفر الله الحمد لله رب العالمين والعاقبة للمتقين ولا عدوان إلا على الظالمين وأشهد أن لا إله إلا الله وحده لا شريك له وأشهد أن محمدًا عبده ورسوله صلى الله عليه وعلى آله وصحبه صلاة دائمة مستمرة سرمدية إلى يوم الدين وبعد

The Man of Jannah

During the time of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam a Bedouin came out of the desert he came to the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he said to him دلني على عمل إذا عملته دخلت الجنة Messenger of Allah inform me of an action or basically tell me what to do so that when I do it I will enter Jannah.

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to him that you affirm that the oneness of Allah is without any partners and that you establish your Salah that you pay your Zakah and in another narration and that you fast your Ramadan and he didn't include Hajj yet because it was not part of that discussion yet and then the man said وَالَّذِي بَعَثَكَ بِالْحَقِّ and by the one who has sent you the truth I shall not increase or do more than what you have said nor will I do less than what you have said.

And for those of you here you might think well we all know that we are Muslims, we pray, we fast, we do Ramadan, etc but if you think about these three things there are three different areas Salah is your relationship between you and Allah knowing about your priority Zakah is really about social justice and what you are responsible in helping other people and fasting is really a combination of both because you're building empathy you're purifying yourself, so on and so forth.

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 1897)

And then the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam saw that this man turned around and he left and he went back into the desert and then the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said whoever would like to see a man who is from Jannah then look at this person.

Priorities and Responsibilities

What does this hadith mean? What does it mean to us? It means that you here in this masjid whom Allah has commanded only the men to come to Jum'ah and not the women you have to know that your responsibility is knowing how to prioritize your deen and your dunya prioritizing your relationship with Allah knowing yourself of what you have to do at the end of the day Allah comes first at the end of the day your deen comes first.

Allah says in the Qur'an and from the many believers men they bear witness and they were truthful to what Allah has promised them in the fact that what is that promise? that if they live out their duty to worship Allah Jannah will not outlive them. Right? And some of those they continue struggling worshiping Allah until they passed away and some people are just still you know in life struggling worshiping Allah and they did not stray they did not go away from that message.

True Leadership and Protection

A lot of times brothers some they like to they like to invoke this verse and it's very unfortunate because they use this verse inappropriately and incorrectly to exert their dominance or their presumed favor of themselves over women and they like to quote the verse:

That men are established protectors over women وَلِلذَّكَرِ مِثْلُ حَظِّ الْأُنْثَيَيْنِ and men have over women one degree only and it's like Allah did not use this verse for you to subjugate the other gender Allah used this verse to put on your shoulders a responsibility that you as men you are supposed to take care of your family.

(Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 1977)

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says The best among you are the best to your family so taking care of your family is your top priority and I am the best to my family this is what the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is saying about himself that you don't put your job over your family priorities.

Your business or your transactions does not distract you from the remembrance of Allah and so on establishing the prayer and giving the zakah.

Standing Up for Truth and Justice

Brothers and sisters we live in a time where speaking the truth is a very sought after characteristic standing up for the truth defending the weak standing up for those who are oppressed because a lot of times we're conditioned to think ما دخلني أنا it's not my business it's not my problem I'm just minding my own business I'm just worrying about myself and it's that apathy brothers and sisters that is a problem.

We look in the life of Musa alayhi as-salam after the Pharaoh threatened Musa this man who was a believer from Al-Firaun يَكْتُمُ إِيمَانَهُ he was hiding his faith because he knew he would be oppressed he stood up for Musa:

He says are you going to kill someone who says Allah is my Lord and in the same story of Musa alayhi as-salam we find that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells us of another man who came to warn Musa of Firaun's plots and machinations:

A man came from the farthest of the city running to Musa that the people of Firaun they are plotting against you.

Emotional Intelligence and Control

Brothers and sisters the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam despite being the strongest man he was very much in touch with his emotions he didn't suppress his emotions letting your emotions come forth when you are sad that's not weakness when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam's son passed away he cried he didn't say oh crying is for weak people he let his emotions come forth.

(Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2328)

And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as described by Aisha radiallahu anha how did he keep his emotions under control? That he never hit anyone he never hit anyone and never hit a woman and he never hit a servant.

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 3559)

And in another narration we find that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam didn't have a bad language for example you know sometimes we look at someone and you know they start using bad language a very colorful language and we think that you know they're exercising their right free speech etc no and yet this is Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam how many people have come to anger him and he watched what he said.

The Noble Character

Brothers and sisters when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was at the beginning of his message when Jibreel came to him and he was in a state of fright he went back to Khadija and he said wrap me up and he was afraid of what was going on and what did Khadija radiallahu anha say to him كلا no Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will never humiliate you Allah will never humiliate you why number one because you keep good relations with your relatives and that you are honest and you help those who are in need and you support the weak and you feed those who are hungry in another narration you are generous to your guests and you help those who are in distress.

So brothers and sisters allow us to learn from the sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the true art of prophetic manliness so that we will be better people in our worship to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

Oh Allah, give us what is the best in this world and the best in the next life and protect us from the fire. Oh Allah, send your blessings and Salah upon Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Oh Allah, show us the truth as truth and give us the ability to follow it and show us falsehood as falsehood and give us the ability to stay away from it.

Oh Allah, we ask you to give victory and to help all those who are oppressed.