The Silver Lining || Friday Reminder || Virtual Khutbah || Mufti Abdul Rahman Waheed

The Silver Lining — Friday Reminder

Allah says in His Noble Book, after seeking refuge in Allah from the accursed Shaytan:

"For indeed, it is not the eyes that go blind, but it is the hearts within the chests that go blind."

And He says in another place:

"The time of people's reckoning has drawn near, yet they are heedless and turning away. No reminder comes to them from their Lord that is new, except that they listen to it while they play — with their hearts distracted."

And the Prophet ﷺ said:

(Reported by Ahmad in his Musnad; see also Musnad Ahmad, Hadith 17371)

"Successful indeed is the one who has made his heart sincere for faith, made his heart sound, his tongue truthful, his soul tranquil, his character upright, and his ear attentive."

The Heart Is the Key

Brothers and sisters, when help and guidance comes to us from all our sources — we are blessed as Muslims because we have a beautiful source that can liberate us and change our lives. We have the Qur'an and the Hadith. We have the life of the Prophet ﷺ. We have the lives of the Sahaba.

We will not benefit from this if our hearts are not in the right place, because these things don't affect our ears — they affect your heart.

Abu Bakr and the Last Days of the Prophet ﷺ

Abu Bakr was an individual whose heart was extremely soft. Let me give you a few stories about how the Sahaba were so affected by the Qur'an and the life of the Prophet ﷺ that it was enough to change their lives. And today, Ramadan is coming again — is it going to change our lives? We hear the Qur'an every single day. Does it really motivate us? What is different today than it was for them? It is the same Qur'an. Same life of the Prophet ﷺ.

It was the last few days of the Prophet's ﷺ life. He became very sick, very ill. Many of you know that the last days of someone's life are so difficult — when you know someone is terminally ill, may Allah save us from this, and you know the doctors have said he only has a few days left, a few weeks left — the entire schedule of your life is around that now. Hospital, this, hospital, that. And it becomes extremely difficult.

Many times the burial, when the person passes away, is a relief. Alhamdulillah, we're done. He's in a better place. But the months before have been so challenging. Many people experience this مَرَضُ الْوَفَاة — the sickness before death. And if you read about the pious predecessors and the sickness before they leave this world, in those days the entire world shuts down.

Literally. When Salahuddin Ayyub had 12 days and nights of مَرَضُ الْوَفَاة — 12 days and nights — now he was a great man, a great leader, a pious person. In those 12 days the whole world shut down. Everybody — remember in those days they had no Facebook, no text messaging, there was no way to find out what the condition is — so everybody is in the masjid, they have closed their stores, they're not eating, they're not taking care of their health, and everyone is just waiting to hear a message from the palace: how is he feeling today? Is he getting better or not? And that is how مَرَضُ الْوَفَاة is — the sickness that leads to death of the pious predecessors. People start to be in a state of mourning before you even pass away.

Finding the Silver Lining in Tragedy

When my brother passed away — you know, it's hard to ever think this — but Umar ibn al-Khattab used to say that if you go through a tragedy, always think that it could have been worse. Always think like that.

Now, when someone passes away suddenly — a young person — how can you ever think it could have been worse? Most people will tell you it couldn't have been worse than this. This is the worst it could get. But it could have been worse. Umar ibn al-Khattab is telling you: whenever you go through a tragedy, think about this first — it could have been worse. And actually, it could have been worse. Imagine if my brother was in this accident paralyzed for life — wasn't that worse? Imagine he was in the hospital and our whole family now has to go back and forth. Does it happen to people? It happens to people all the time. So it could have been worse. So we say alhamdulillah it was not worse.

And Umar ibn al-Khattab says: at least the tragedy came with your wealth, with your body — but not with your أَعْمَال and إِيمَان. At least a tragedy came with your car, but not your iman. At least with your body, but not your أَعْمَال.

My father was crying so much and I told him: you know what, if you found out that one of your sons left Islam — wouldn't that hurt more? He said, of course, that's unbearable. Isn't that unbearable? If you found out — may Allah save us — people find out their children leave Islam, you cannot even see their faces. If you have any faith, you go into a state that you cannot even imagine: when you find out your son, your loved one, left Islam. So I told my father: Umar ibn al-Khattab said that when you go through tragedy, think of the fact that at least it was with your wealth, with something of this world, something of materialism — but not of your iman. Allah never took your iman. Because if Allah wants, He could take our iman — may Allah save us.

The third thing Umar ibn al-Khattab says: anytime you go through a tragedy, just imagine — alhamdulillah it was in dunya and not in akhira. Because all the pain of dunya will stay here. A person who goes through pain over here will not go through pain in akhira, insha'Allah, if he has iman. It finishes the moment you leave this world — now you are in the hospitality of Allah, and Allah will not put you through pain. So they always say: look, think about what could have been worse.

Abu Bakr's Softness of Heart

So, Abu Bakr was sitting there. Everybody now realizes that the Prophet ﷺ is in his last days of life. He is extremely sick. People still have hope that he will be fine. But in those last days, suddenly he tells the people in the room: make Abu Bakr lead Salah.

Now this was very alarming to the people who were there, because if the Prophet ﷺ was so sick that he had to be carried by two people, he would still come and lead Salah. So how sick was he that he could not even leave his room to lead Salah? It was really bad. It was so bad that he could not even put his miswak in his own mouth — Aisha would put the miswak, and he would put his hand over her hand, and she would do the miswak. The Prophet ﷺ was so sick that he used to always recite the three surahs and blow over his hands and over his body before he would sleep — he could not even do that. So he would blow, and Aisha would wipe his hands over his body.

So he could not get up to lead Salah. He said: make Abu Bakr lead Salah. After this message was passed, people were even more sad, even more grieved. What has happened to the Prophet ﷺ?

They go out to lead Salah. The Prophet ﷺ was lying down, and all of a sudden he hears Umar ibn al-Khattab leading Salah. Who did he tell to lead Salah? Abu Bakr. And the moment he hears the Allahu Akbar, he says: remove him from the place of the Imam. Nobody can lead Salah as long as Abu Bakr is alive, in his presence. Umar ibn al-Khattab is the second greatest Sahabi; the greatest Sahabi is Abu Bakr. So he said: remove him and put Abu Bakr in front.

Then the Prophet ﷺ asked: who told Umar to lead Salah? Then Aisha told the Prophet ﷺ: you know your friend and I know my father. You know how he is — he cannot even get through a few verses of the Qur'an without crying and breaking down. Imagine in this state, how difficult it would be for him to lead Salah. He would not get through Allahu Akbar — he is in the place of the Prophet ﷺ, and the Prophet ﷺ is sick and he has to lead Salah. He would not get through it. So that is why I said make Umar lead Salah. That is how soft his heart was. His heart was so soft for the Qur'an.

The Story of Ibn Dughna and Abu Bakr's Recitation

In the famous story of Ibn Dughna — when Abu Bakr was leaving Mecca, migrating to Abyssinia — a person intercepted him. His name was Ibn Dughna, and he said: Abu Bakr, where are you going? He said: I am moving to Abyssinia, Ethiopia, because you guys are not allowing me to worship Allah in Mecca. And Ibn Dughna said: no, a person like you should never leave, and should never be kicked out of the city. You know — a good neighbour, you do not want him to leave. You want the good neighbour to stay.

Ibn Dughna was not Muslim. He was not Muslim, but he appreciated the value of Abu Bakr in the community. So he brings him back. He tells the people of Quraysh: let him worship Allah, let him do his thing. And they said: we have no problem with him. The only problem we have is when he reads Qur'an — he reads in the Masjid al-Haram, and when he recites, all the women and children come around him. He recites in such a good, emotional manner that it melts the hearts of people around him. And we don't want our children and our women to accept Islam. So tell him to recite Qur'an somewhere else.

Ibn Dughna said: Abu Bakr, why don't you recite Qur'an in your house? He said: OK, I will recite Qur'an in my house. I will not recite in public places.

After a few days, Abu Bakr realized: you know what, this is the Qur'an — people should hear it. But I already made a promise that I am not going to recite in a public place. So instead of reciting in a public place, he started reciting in his front yard, in his courtyard — which is outdoor. And now he is praying Salah and reciting there, and people are gathering around his house. He recites, he is emotional in the way he recites, and people are accepting Islam because of this. And that is how he used to recite, because it was affecting his heart.

When the Heart Grows Hard

Many years later — and I am going to say this one thing and then conclude — Abu Bakr was sitting down as Khalifa. People came to accept Islam. In those days, when people would accept Islam, there were no books, no brochures to give to people. Even the Qur'an was not in book format. So the only way you would learn it is through a person. So they accept Islam, they were told: go sit in that corner, and I am going to send someone to you to teach you.

Now, as he is reciting Qur'an — these people were from Yemen — as he is reciting, these people start to cry. Every single verse this person recites, these people are crying so much. And Abu Bakr looks at them and he says: we were just like this. Then our hearts became hard. Meaning: we were just like this when we used to hear the Qur'an — we would cry, it would be emotional, it would make us break down. But then this happened and our hearts became hard.

Do you think he would not cry when he would recite Qur'an? He would still cry. But he made a point. Many times things of deen become so ritualistic they do not affect us anymore. They do not have the same power anymore.

For example, someone who accepted Islam before this Ramadan — this is their first Ramadan. Look at how they feel. My first iftar. My first suhoor. My first Tarawih. They have a different feeling to it. And here we are: oh yeah, it's another Ramadan coming. Someone who opens the Qur'an, does not know how to recite, does not know Arabic, and then learns Arabic and starts reciting it — has a different feeling. Someone who goes for Hajj for the first time, they value and cherish it. So what happens to us is that the same things that motivate people no longer motivate us anymore. And why does this happen? Because the hearts become hard.

The Four Stages of the Heart

There are four different stages of the heart.

Stage One: The Distracted Heart

The first stage is when your heart becomes distracted. When your heart is distracted, you cannot change. Imagine you are sitting in a speech but your heart is not there — can you change yourself? Will it motivate you? Imagine you are reciting Qur'an but your heart is not there — will it motivate you? Imagine you are at a funeral and your heart is at your business — will that funeral change your life?

I believe most of the Ummah is in the first category. Alhamdulillah, we are not in the last few categories, so it is easier to change — we are not that far off. We are stuck at that position where we come for Salah but our hearts are still distracted. We are reading Qur'an but our hearts are still distracted. The month of Ramadan comes and our hearts are still distracted with things outside of Ramadan. People are planning business deals in Ramadan — habibī, nothing should be planned in Ramadan. Everything is put aside. People would watch every single word they would say so they could speak less in the month of Ramadan. Because our hearts are so distracted.

A person who goes through tragedy — like we went through a tragedy when my brother passed away — your heart becomes so soft. When someone comes and sits next to you, he does not even have to ask you how you are feeling; he will just realize. The moment they see a person with a broken heart, they also get affected, they also start crying, they also start feeling the same thing without the person saying any word. And that is why I believe the Prophet ﷺ was so effective — because his heart was so tender. So anyone who would sit with him would feel the same thing. He did not have to say anything. And today we speak so much with little effect.

So if you came next to us on October 5th and 6th and the following weeks, you did not have to ask any of our brothers how they were feeling — the moment you sat down next to us, you would have felt the tenderness. When we were reading Qur'an in those days, the verses — like I had heard Surah al-Waqi'ah all my life, I had heard Surah al-Rahman all my life — but in those days when I heard Surah al-Waqi'ah and Surah al-Rahman, they made you cry.

You know, when someone accepts Islam and they are saying لَا إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ مُحَمَّدٌ رَّسُولُ اللَّهِ — we have said this all our life. It does not make us emotional. It does not make us cry. But someone who is accepting Islam — how many times have we seen they struggle to say the Kalima, they cry so much, they are so emotional. Why? Why is it different? I mean, I have never cried saying the Kalima in my life — until my brother passed away. And I realized after that it is because it is all about the heart. When you go through difficulty and your heart becomes tender and soft, the words have a different impact — completely different impact.

You have Sahaba who are reciting سُبْحَانَ رَبِّيَ الْأَعْلَى and they cry and they shiver so much in Sajda. And then you have us reciting سُبْحَانَ رَبِّيَ الْأَعْلَى and it has no impact. Same words. Why? Because of the way they said it, where it came from, how much they had to sacrifice for it, what they had to go through for it — because of that when they recite the Kalima it has a different impact.

Stage Two: The Rusted Heart

The next stage of the heart is the heart that starts getting rusted because of sins. And this is the natural disposition of the heart — you cannot do anything about it. People as they grow older will get grey hair. People as they get older, their hair will start to thin. It does not matter what you do. Similarly, the Prophet ﷺ said: these hearts will get rusted. It is not a question of if — it is a question of when. It will get rusted. For Muslims or non-Muslims, everyone — it will happen.

The Sahaba did not say: Ya Rasulullah, please make du'a that our hearts do not get rusted. They did not say that. They asked for the solution. So if that is the case, then what should we do?

Stage Three: The Diseased Heart

Some people's hearts, when they get so much rust — then what happens? They become diseased. They literally become diseased.

Stage Four: The Sealed Heart

And the fourth stage of the heart is that Allah seals your heart. Now nothing — nothing — can penetrate:

"It is the same for them whether you warn them or do not warn them — they will not believe." The Prophet ﷺ is being told: even if you speak to them, they are not going to change. Because they did not focus on their heart at the initial stage. When you do not focus, it gets worse, and worse, and worse — until it gets to that point where nothing happens. Now nothing will affect you.

The Remedy: Two Prescriptions

So what is the way so that we can be motivated by these things? How can we be motivated? Ramadan is coming again. The Qur'an is in front of us. Why do we not feel the same shiver in our spine? Why do we not have that same tear in our eye as Abu Bakr and the Sahaba had when they were listening to the same verses? As a non-Muslim has when they recite the Kalima? Why? What is the way to remove this?

First: Remembrance of Death

He said:

The first thing is: remember death frequently. There is a word in Arabic called مُرَاقَبَةُ الْمَوْتِ — literally, sit down and put yourself in the grave in your imagination. Put yourself in a shroud, in a casket, in your own imagination. And then work backwards. Okay, on that day — how would I want to be? What do I want people to say about me after I leave this world? What do I want to meet Allah with? Start backwards from there.

A person who thinks about this a lot — his heart becomes tender automatically. We go to the grave to see my brother all the time. If you go there with اسْتِحْضَار — full presence of heart — it affects you. Because now you are seeing: this is the reality of life. This is where it all ends. So now — that is why the Prophet ﷺ said: keep thinking about that. Every single day, think about that.

When I am in that situation — it is not about if, it is about when. Work backwards. Right now we are working forwards: 2 years, 5 years, 10 years, 15 years. But it should be all the way around. So that when that moment comes, you are ready.

Ibn Abi Hazm says:

"Write down all those things that you would not want to be doing when مَلَكُ الْمَوْت comes — and then leave them now." Make a to-do list and a not-to-do list. These are things that I do not want to be doing when مَلَكُ الْمَوْت — the Angel of Death — comes to me.

Now it has nothing to do with حَلَال and حَرَام. You can argue that watching sitcoms and dramas and movies is perfectly fine. But would you want to die doing that? I do not think anyone with a sound mind would want to die doing that. Okay, so if you do not want to die doing that — just stop it right now. Because you do not know when death is going to come anyway. So that is how you prepare. When you do these things, your heart will stay focused.

Second: Recitation of the Qur'an

And the second thing is:

Keep reciting Qur'an over and over and over again. It is a heart softener, it is a soul softener. And that is why the month of Ramadan is coming. If before the month of Ramadan we do not start doing this right now, we will not benefit from Ramadan. Ramadan will come and go and nothing will happen to us.

But people will change their lives. Our elders used to say: going to Medina and Mecca, people come back with so much نُور. And some people come back with a drop of نُور. And how does that happen? He said: listen — if it is raining, and in Mecca and Medina it is raining نُور, so much نُور there — and if it is raining and the pot is upside down, it does not matter how much it rains. When you turn the pot around, there is going to be nothing in there. And if the pot is facing upwards — even if it is a drop, you know when the roof leaks, even if it is one drop at a time — it will get filled.

So we need to make sure our vessel is perfectly positioned and we prepare for this before Ramadan comes, so that we can benefit and motivate ourselves in the month of Ramadan.

May Allah make us among those who truly act upon whatever was said and bring it to our lives.

وَآخِرُ دَعْوَانَا أَنِ الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ