Candlelight Conversation with Shaykh Zubair Abdurrahman | Mufti Azeemuddin Ahmed | Imam Dawud Walid

Opening Invocation

In the name of Allah, the most Merciful, the most Compassionate. O Allah, send blessings and peace upon our Master Muhammad and upon the family of our Master Muhammad. Blessings and peace.

O Allah, open my heart and ease my affairs. Open my tongue so that my speech can be understood.

Glory be to You, we have no knowledge except what You have taught us. You are the All-Knowing, the All-Wise. O Allah, teach us what benefits us and benefit us with what You have taught us. And increase us in knowledge and action.

O Allah, enlighten our hearts with Your knowledge. And use our bodies for Your service. And guide us to what You love and are pleased with — from speech, action, intention, and guidance. You are capable of everything.

Introduction

What I do want to say is that these are two amazing personalities that we're with today and two amazing, different topics. And I want to give due right to each one of them. Imam Dawud has to leave the hotel at 5 a.m. to catch his flight tomorrow morning. So I've requested Shaykh Zubair, hafidahullah, that I wanted to have a discussion with Imam Dawud first, initially. And insha'Allah, part two will be with Shaykh Zubair, hafidahullah.

I hope all of you will honor our guest — the fact that Shaykh Zubair has not slept since morning. He had a red-eye flight from Phoenix, and subhanAllah, he's been awake since then till now. So after going through such a long journey, he is with us. I ask all of you who can stay back to please stay back, insha'Allah, and benefit from both of these great personalities.

Part One: Conversation with Imam Dawud Walid on Futuwwa

The Book Futuwwa and Its Origins

You all had a chance to benefit from Imam Dawud earlier today on the beautiful talk of Malcolm X, and then he had two sessions with the reverts as well. Today I would like to take it in a different direction — specifically about the book that he has written, which is, masha'Allah, a manual used in many Islamic schools and masajid whenever they want to discuss masculinity. His book is called Futuwwa.

Alhamdulillah, it is a very popular book, and many of you have heard of it. So right off the bat, I want to ask the Shaykh: what led you to even think about writing this book?

Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim. Alhamdulillahi Rabbil Alameen. First of all, before getting to the question — Al-Habib al-Mustafa, alayhis salam, reportedly said:

That blessing is with one's elders — elders in age as well as elders in knowledge.

And mashallah, I feel shy to speak in front of Mawlana Zubair, because he is my elder in ilm and my elder in age. And it is in gatherings like this, with rijal like this, that blessings descend from Allah. We ask Allah to continue to bless him and give him al-'afiyah and shifa. Ameen.

The Hadith on the Signs of the Hour

In regards to the occasion behind the book — Futuwwa and Raising Males in Sacred Manhood — to put it in context, we want to quote an authentic hadith of the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, narrated on the authority of Khadim Rasulillah Anas ibn Malik, when he talked about the signs of the Hour:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 81; Sahih Muslim, Book 46, Hadith 2671)

The first sign mentioned: there would be a decrease in al-ilm, in knowledge. The second: there would be a proliferation of al-jahl, ignorance. Then from that, there would be the proliferation of al-zina. The tartib of this hadith — its sequence — is important. Then he said, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, there would be a decrease in al-rijal and an increase in al-nisa', of women — to the extent that there would be fifty women for al-qayyim al-wahid, one particular type of upright, responsible man.

Notice — I was taught by one of my teachers about this — the hadith does not say fifty females for every male. It says fifty women for one particular type of upright, responsible man. So my Shaykh said: all men are males, but all males are not men.

First, all men are males — meaning no woman can go around and say "I'm a trans man." We don't accept that. This is foolishness. This is from the kalam of al-Dajjal. But all males are not men. Of course, we would not refer to a 9-year-old boy who is not mukallaf according to the Shari'ah as a man — that's obvious. However, in the traits and attributes of what makes an upright man, it is very possible that a male could be 30 years old, have a beard, have a deep voice, and bench press 300 pounds and not really be a man. Not rijal.

So part of this is seeing the signs of the time and seeing what is going on in our community — hearing complaints from women, from single mothers, seeing the state of the Muslims from my travels, from the UK to Canada to right here in America. I conferred over a number of years and wrote a book to try to revive futuwwa, sacred chivalry, based upon a program we started at Zawiyah Dar Rahma in Detroit. Dar Rahma is a zawiyah named by Al-Habib Omar ibn Hafiz al-Husayni, hafizahullah ta'ala, from Dar al-Mustafa in Tarim, Yemen. We started a series of futuwwa classes, beginning with Bab al-Futuwwa in Imam al-Qushayri's Risalah, then moving to Kitab al-Futuwwa — weekly dars — which then moved on to organized khidmah, then martial arts, even with Sifu Jabr in Detroit, archery every Saturday — to try to resurrect the aspects of the futuwwa guild that started under the Abbasid Khalifa al-Nasir li-Dinillah. This guild was established in the madrasah of Shaykh Abdul Qadir al-Jilani — who passed away before the retaking of Al-Quds — but a significant percentage of the rijal in the army of Salahuddin al-Ayyubi came from his madrasah and futuwwa guild.

So we just went back to our tradition, tried to institute what we were doing in Detroit, and then I put it into book form after having it reviewed by a couple of my teachers. That is the long answer to your question, Sidi.

The Hadith on Leadership and the Condition of the Ummah

Mashallah. I'm so happy, Shaykh, you talked about the fifty qayyim. Something I just thought of as you were saying that — because previously in madrasah days, when we were studying this hadith, many of the commentators would say: due to war, majority of men would die, and you'd have for every fifty women just one man. But then — the same reflection, subhanAllah — as we saw that men are just honestly not being men, and you see the effects of that, and that makes a lot of sense.

A hadith came to mind — I came across it just last week. I opened up Hayatus Sahabah, sitting in a masjid, and the first hadith I came across — I would like you to give some commentary on it:

(Sunan al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2266 — reported by Abu Hurayrah; graded Hasan)

I'm sure you probably kept this in mind when writing the book. What commentary would you give on it? Because some people misunderstand this and say a Muslim man — astaghfirullah — means you have to hate women, look down upon them, be misogynistic. These are the types of words immediately thrown upon us if we speak about masculinity. "Toxic masculinity" — everyone talks about that. How do we understand that to be men has nothing to do with hating on women or disrespecting women, but rather the complete opposite?

Qiwamah and the Role of Men

In the context of this hadith, when we look at the Qur'an — and I mentioned Shaykh Abdul Qadir al-Jilani, mashallah, he is madhlum. He is madhlum in the sense that he has been erased from the minds of many Muslims and misrepresented. When Allah mentions — we all know the beginning of the ayah:

In this qiwamah — and also when people talk about toxic masculinity — the whole concept of ghayrah is painted as something toxic. Ghayrah means that men are supposed to have a level of protective jealousy — or we can translate it as vigilant care. And there's nothing toxic about this. Notice that in Western language there is "toxic masculinity," but there is no "toxic femininity." Why? The term "toxic masculinity" is designed to pathologize traditional masculinity. It's designed that way.

So in regards to qiwamah — qawwamun literally means hafidhun — what it means to be a man is that they are to have guardianship and protection over women. Does this mean taking care of physical needs? Yes. Protecting women from starvation. Protecting women from physical harm. Also protecting women's spiritual state — that nothing comes into contact with women that would harm their spiritual state, their hal. And in this day and time, some of us have been tricked through post-modernism that everything is supposed to be equal between men and women. That's not so. There is a level of equity in regards to responsibilities, but if we were to be honest — if women were to be honest — they know that they are not equal to men in everything, physically and even on some levels emotionally. And vice versa — Allah gave certain fada'il to women over men. This is how the balance is kept.

So in relation to the hadith, this is the way we should understand it: Allah has given us certain fada'il as men, and with those fada'il comes responsibility — there is taklif that comes along with this. We've been given more physical strength. We've been given the charge of qiwamah. And with this comes more responsibility, and more accountability — more hisab — on the Day of Judgment in relation to how we deal with the womenfolk.

The Crisis of Ghayrah — Protective Jealousy

Jazakumullah khair. We talked about ghayrah — protective jealousy. This is becoming slowly a very foreign concept. Just this week I was told about a brother — 40 to 45 years old — who said a mutual friend, every time he comes to his house, hugs his wife. And this brother found out that it happens every single time this person comes over, and he said, "I feel weird. I don't know how to tell him."

And then I've actually heard people saying — I actually heard people saying — "I want to marry a trophy wife. I want to parade around with her, and people should look up to me." Like you parade around with a fancy car, "I want a fancy wife." And when someone mentioned that a particular girl had a questionable reputation, he said, "I don't mind. Even if after we get married she's still seen hanging out with guys — that's a price I'm willing to pay just to have an attractive wife." SubhanAllah. And when you tell such a person, "Brother, what are you doing?" he says, "I don't have that low self-esteem that I need to be overprotective. I have strong self-esteem." That's how ghayrah is being framed today. So how do you address this mindset within the young generation?

Ghayrah is a virtue in Islam. And as we mentioned in the bayan on Yawm al-Jumu'ah, virtue is in the wasat — in the middle, between ifrat and tafrit, between excess and negligence. Ghayrah is a virtue. The extreme to one side is a man who is completely harsh with women — a brute, violent, who speaks foul language to women, or who doesn't even allow his wife to go see her own mahram family members. I know of such extremes right here in Michigan. Then you have the other extreme — what you're describing is basically what we call in Arabic a dayyuth. That is a man who doesn't mind any man cavorting with his womenfolk — to the extent he doesn't even mind non-mahram men touching his woman. This is another extreme.

So what it means to have vigilant care — protective jealousy — is to be in the middle of these two extremes. This is part of Islam, and it's not just a social issue. This relates to one's standing with Allah. If a man has no problem with men looking at his wife up and down or touching his womenfolk or his daughters, this is actually a sinful state. This is a person who has disease in their heart. This relates directly to our standing with Allah. So we have to be very careful not to let Western norms — especially for younger people who've gone to liberal arts universities where young men get polluted with ideas that strip masculinity — emasculate us. Do not take on these so-called progressive ideas.

Men in MSA and Campus Spaces

Let's talk about the college students sitting here. I had a situation: a certain college randomly reached out needing a Jumu'ah khatib. And who's reaching out? A young sister. She was the MSA president — 19 or 20 years old — coordinating the Jumu'ah khutbah every week, running all the programs. I sat down and asked, "Where are the brothers?" Five brothers sat down. It was such a sad conversation. These guys looked spineless. I asked, "Where is your ghayrah? Why is a sister doing the khutbah coordination? Why didn't you call me?" And subhanAllah — when she graduated and left for medical school or engineering, guess what? Done. Finished. No more programs. Nobody reached out after that.

What advice do you have for young men who say, "It's a completely women-dominated space. We're scared to speak up. They'll outvote us. We feel silenced." What do you say to them?

A couple of general points and one specific. The first: sisters cannot take your manhood — you voluntarily relinquish it. A woman is in no position to take your manhood; you give it up. That's number one. Number two: steel sharpens steel. If you want to become a man, you sit at the feet of rijal — people who are senior to yourself, who are responsible and manly. Those are two general pieces of advice.

Now in regards to the MSAs on your campuses — be respectful, but you as men are supposed to take the lead. And I say this respectfully: stop referring to young men in college as "boys." You're producing mama's boys. He's not a boy — he's a man. The Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, approved Abdullah ibn Umar for an expedition — he was fifteen years old. Treat these young men as men, and they will rise to the occasion. You keep calling them "your boy," driving to campus to bring them biryani and chicken tikka masala — let him learn to make peanut butter and jelly. Let him wash his own clothes.

But as young brothers — if you step up and take your responsibility and be respectful as men on these college campuses, it is in the fitrah of the sisters to naturally fall in place. It is their shakila — naturally. But when we are weak, indecisive, and irresponsible, then women fill the space that men have abandoned. Women only step in to play the role of men when men are absent and only males are present. So don't complain about the sisters. The sisters are only acting that way because the brothers aren't being men in those spaces. And when the sister graduates and there is no Salatul Jumu'ah — whose fault is that? It's the brothers' fault.

Solutions: Rebuilding Masculinity

Now — this loss of masculinity — is it a solvable problem within our community? And if so, what are some tips for everyone to take home?

We always have to put forth effort. The reality is we are in Akhir al-Zaman right now. The closer we get to the appearance of Al-Masih al-Dajjal, things globally will deteriorate — bila shakk, there is no doubt. However, that doesn't mean we don't put forth effort. Can we help change the condition of our localities with Allah's permission? Most definitely, bismillahi ta'ala.

What can we do? First of all, as older men and those of us who have sons — this tarbiyah must start in the home. When Allah said in the Qur'an:

Guard yourselves and your families from hellfire. Sayyidina Ali ibn Abi Talib said: Addibuhum wa 'allimuhum — discipline them and teach them. Instill manners and teach them knowledge. This starts in the home. Some of us as fathers — we have to check our own hearts. Are we working these long hours at the cost of not raising our sons properly? Not showing them our time? This is what we must interrogate.

The second thing: it takes a village to raise a boy to become a man. So we have to be practical about placing our sons at the feet of the mashayikh. And third — put our sons purposely in environments where they will experience some mashaqqa — difficulty and rigor. Males, in order to become men, have to go through some discomfort. They have to be pushed. Just like a diamond is nothing but a piece of carbon that becomes the hardest substance by being squeezed and pressed by intense pressure and heat — that's how diamonds are made. The life of comfort is a detriment in forging males into men.

During my time in Mali — by the Burkina Faso border, the land of the famous Timbuktu and Mansa Musa — I saw on two different occasions how they would take the young males out away from the village, away from their families, and teach them about manhood training. They would take them into the wilderness — you need to know how to catch and kill your own food, how to sleep outside, how to handle manly responsibility. When you come back to the village — if you pass the test — you are now a man. There is a rite of passage. You come back as a man.

We have to develop these types of rites of passage for our young males. Not camping trips with air-conditioned cabins — that's ridiculous. They sleep on the floor. Minimal supplies. Teach them to hunt. We go deer hunting in Michigan. They have to go through some sort of difficulty — instead of just Uber Eats. Our young males have been allowed to become too comfortable, and this is a problem if we want to have men.

So to summarize — number one: tarbiyah starts with the fathers. Number two: sit them at the feet of the mashayikh to learn adab and ilm — al-adab qabla al-ilm, manners before knowledge. Number three: put them in rustic activities where they have to rough it, go through difficulty and discomfort.

What age do you start? After the age of seven according to the Islamic calendar, introduce some form of discipline and stop letting them play freely. By age fourteen, take them out to rough it. They should be involved in some sort of martial arts — it's good for physical activity, and it's good for the nafs. The Sahaba wrestled. See the translation by Shaykh Nisar in the UK at Cordoba Foundation — he translated Jalaluddin al-Suyuti's book on the hadith about the wrestling of the Sahaba. Jujitsu, archery, deer hunting — build it up slowly. By age fourteen or fifteen, they should be able to tough it out.

The Effect of Technology on Masculinity

What do you think the role of technology, video games, and cell phones has been? What has it done to masculinity?

On a very basic level, technology is hormonally making males more feminine. Testosterone rates for young males now are lower than in my generation — Generation X — which is lower than the Baby Boomer generation. Why? Because we sit down more and are less active. Between poor diets and lack of physical activity, these devices are literally lowering testosterone levels and raising estrogen levels. On a physiological level, males are becoming softer. Those of you in Gen Z are softer than my generation — generally speaking. That's one negative effect.

Number two: the attention span. Generally speaking, men are more task-driven and able to focus. Because of the shakila of a woman, she tends to multitask more naturally — she's a mother by nature. But now young males can't focus as much either. This is why you have to sit at the feet of the mashayikh — to learn adab, to do hifz al-Qur'an, to actually focus, to learn hadith. And there is barakah in learning the asanid of the hadith — in this ilm, there is noor transmitted into the hearts of students.

And third — the harm to the qulub from social media: the backbiting, the gossiping, the random ads of women who aren't covered properly. The advertisers target you, and once you click on one thing, it enters your algorithm. Our eyes are a gateway to our souls. So there are physical consequences, intellectual consequences, and spiritual consequences to these smartphones. And I'm going to tell you — you're not missing anything if you get off. I closed down all of my social media accounts about five years ago and didn't miss anything. If people want to contact me, they know how to reach me. I suggest to you, young brothers — get off social media as much as you can. Delete those apps. You don't need TikTok and Instagram. It's more harmful than any benefit it could provide.

Dual-Income Homes and Qiwamah

One of the most-asked questions: how to deal with the rise of dual-income homes, with more women in the workplace — where the wife sometimes has a larger income than the husband. How do you ensure the husband still remains qawwam?

We have to be honest, brothers. The worst lie anyone can tell you is not another person lying to you — it's you lying to yourself. So what are our maqasid in this life? Are we marrying a woman knowing she has a job or a degree, thinking that's going to raise our material standard of living so we can live in a certain zip code? We have to interrogate ourselves. Why are we making certain life choices? Does my wife really have to work — or do we want her to work so that we can live in upper-middle-class respectability? That's something we have to interrogate.

It's not a problem in and of itself for a woman to work — it depends on the type of work and the environment. I've dealt with three recent cases of married women doing medical residencies who committed zina with supervising doctors, because when your wife is around another man eight to twelve hours a day — interacting with him more than with you — Shaytan comes in. Even without intending for problems to happen, problems happen. So at what cost? We have to be able to have these conversations.

Another piece of advice — I coach young brothers who are looking to get married: sit with your father or a male elder and make a list with two categories. The first category is non-negotiables. The second is strong preferences. Write down what you absolutely cannot negotiate. If a girl meets six of seven non-negotiables but violates one, she's off the table. If she meets most of your preferences and all of the non-negotiables, then she's someone you can approach her wali about. You have to be honest and clear.

One of my students, whose nikah insha'Allah is on May 31st — a Syrian brother and student of Habib Omar — said very clearly: "I don't want to marry a doctor or an attorney. They interact with the opposite gender too much." He was honest about his non-negotiable. And he found what he was looking for. You have to be honest. And remember — Rasulullah, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, told Sayyidina Ali that the first nazrah is for you — then you lower your gaze. You don't get a second look.

Raising Daughters — Practical Advice for Fathers

For those who have only daughters — what practical advice can we give? One father told me he had done everything for his eight-year-old daughter's tarbiyah — Qur'an school, tajweed — and then asked: "But how do you uproot feminism from her?" And as soon as he said that, he just looked down and said, "Forget it. She's only eight and I'm already saying it's too late." So as dads who have daughters, what are some practical things we can do to teach women their role and prepare them to respectfully engage with their husbands?

And subhanAllah, Shaykh, I think a big problem is the fathers themselves — desi dads and Arab dads born and raised overseas, who come here, drink the water, and change completely. "My princess, my princess." That's not how their own mothers were raised. And now the first thing a daughter calls to say she's not getting along with her husband — the parents send a limousine instead of saying, "You both have to sort it out." Previously, those marriages lasted fifty years. Now they can't last five months.

Two things. Number one — for the sake of Allah — and I have two daughters — we as men have to embody prophetic manhood inside our homes. Because the first example of manhood our daughters see is us as their fathers. If we aren't being real men, that starts with a problem.

The second thing: we have to educate ourselves and understand what I'd call fiqh al-waqi' — knowing the facts on the ground. We study the Qur'an, we learn hadith, we know the basics of our madhhab — but we also have to understand the intellectual trends of this society and what our daughters are being exposed to. One practical thing I do at home: when I'm not traveling, we have dinner at the table together, and I bring up contemporary issues to get their opinions — and then I start answering things and undoing the misinformation. Fathers — you need to know what's going on, because your children know about it. Whether you're aware of it or not, it's influencing their thought patterns. So we have to understand context, not just text.

Staying Aware — Knowing What Your Children Know

This is something I call "checking the oil in the car." Parents say, "I can't believe I just found out my son has come out as an atheist." But you don't become an atheist overnight. It's been going on for a long time — you simply didn't see it. Striking up conversations about current contemporary issues is a great way to gauge where your children are. What are your thoughts about gay rights? And if someone says, "Come on, man — live and let live, what's the big deal?" that's a sign that something has gone wrong in their understanding.

For older parents who aren't sure what's going on — when you come to the masjid and pray and have general conversations, there will be brothers, including younger brothers, who can update you about what is happening in society. What is the social discourse?

(Sunan al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2166)

Alaikum bil jama'ah — there are so many blessings for being in the jama'ah. We are Ahl al-Sunnah wal Jama'ah. There is benefit to be learned. So if you don't know, go to those who do know. Even I have to go and talk to the shabab about what's going on. I hear phrases now that I don't even know what's being said. We could all be speaking English while our children use terms to which we assign old definitions that have taken on entirely new meanings. Even the word "gay" — in my lifetime of 53 years, it has taken on four or five different meanings.

Part Two: Conversation with Shaykh Zubair Abdurrahman

Introduction of Shaykh Zubair Abdurrahman

Shaykh Zubair Abdurrahman embraced Islam at the age of 23 while serving in the United States Coast Guard. His father accepted Islam while stationed in Alaska and played an early role in exposing him to the faith. Masha'Allah, his father is over 100 years old — still alive, alhamdulillah, in Detroit. His early journey was not without challenges. During the turbulent 1970s, he encountered groups such as the Nubian Islamic Hebrews and the Nation of Islam. However, through sincere mentorship and guidance, he was steered away from misguidance towards orthodox Islamic teachings.

Inspired by the efforts of da'wah and tabligh and scholars like Mawlana Shaykh Yusuf Talal De Lorenzo, Shaykh Zubair pursued traditional Islamic education, initially intending to study in Pakistan. However, he was directed by Hazrat Abul Hasan Ali al-Nadwi, rahimahullah, to study in Bangalore, India, where he spent five years at Sa'eed ul-Rashad. He later continued his studies at Darul Hadith in Turkeshwar and spent a year studying qira'ah in Kurnool. Upon completing his studies, he had the honor of having his turban tied by the esteemed Shaykh Abul Hasan Ali al-Nadwi, rahimahullah.

After returning to America, Shaykh Zubair spent 19 years in Detroit, where he, along with Mawlana Haroon, established a madrasah at Masjid Noor, serving the community. Then in 2007, he moved to Phoenix, Arizona, where he served as an imam for seven years. He continues to reside there with his family. Alhamdulillah, I had the honor of visiting him there a few weeks ago and personally inviting him to this retreat.

Madrasa Life in India — A Journey Out of the Comfort Zone

Your trip to India — those of us whose parents are from India find it difficult even to vacation there without expensive hotels with AC. How was it, in those days, to travel to India? Can you give us a glimpse of madrasah life in the 1970s?

Alhamdulillah, my respected brothers. In the 1960s they had the draft for the Vietnam War, and a lot of my neighbors and classmates were drafted. Some of them didn't make it. My neighbors came back in body bags. And that was the Civil Rights era — Black Americans didn't have the same experience as others. My father was in the Second World War from beginning to end, serving in the Navy.

Our jamaat left around 1970 to 1974. I was about the fourth jamaat to leave from here. When we arrived, our plane came into Delhi. As we were coming in over the runway, I saw all these people — and I said to myself, "Man, I thought I was getting away from Vietnam." Then we landed, and Colonel Amiruddin, rahmatullahi alayh, met us there.

At that time in India, there weren't many translators. I remember one time we were in a jamaat, and Shaykh Rashid, rahmatullahi alayh — from the first jamaat to come from Kuwait — was with us in Delhi. He had a brother translating for him who was actually an engineer, not an alim. SubhanAllah — I saw this man translating so smoothly, rolling right along. Then I met him about twenty years later and asked, "Do you know Arabic?" He said, "No." I said, "Well what were you doing up there?" He looked at me and said, "Look, son, I just gave you six points."

So we arrived in Delhi and were visiting different masajid — going on jodha, visiting the brothers. I saw what I thought was blood on the walls — and I said to myself, "Wow, these brothers really love halal meat. Must be sacrificing goats even in the stairway." Later, when I became a resident there, I realized they were spitting paan on the walls. That's what that was. I thought it was blood.

Those days, we would go from one masjid to another. The first time we got there, it's always a cultural shock. We weren't used to things like the Indian-style squat toilet — no toilet paper, just a dalwa. We weren't used to that. We were used to the throne — the Western toilet where you sit like a king. So every time we'd evaluate a mosque, we weren't actually talking about the mosque — we were talking about the toilet.

I'll say — I had a little preparation because of my time in the military. Basic training for six months was something. And then when I decided to go and study, I got permission from the elders and went.

When we arrived at the madrasah, there were about 200 to 700 students. In those days, sometimes parents couldn't feed their children, so they sent them to the madrasah. And the principal would get about one pound of meat, chop it up, and serve it in what they called a piyala — a little small bowl, like a little dish with salad, gravy, hot peppers, and a tiny piece of meat. If you got a bone with some marrow inside — oh, that was like a turkey! You'd have all the rice you wanted — because that's the staple — and you'd pour that little bowl of gravy over it. Once the gravy was gone, dinner was over. One pound of meat for 200 students.

Sometimes, my roommates and I would have roti — we had a stable of cows, so we got our milk for doodh pati in the morning. If you got there late, you only got a piece of roti. That was breakfast. At midday and evening — rice. That was the food. And alhamdulillah, many huffaz and muftis and great scholars came out of that environment. Those kids who were thought of as slow — they became great scholars. Alhamdulillah, all of them are doing great work now.

I also caught malaria twice. And I remember a time I had what they call a "shifted navel" — when your navel shifts, you have a runny stomach and get dehydrated. I was so sick, going back and forth. A brother saw me and said, "You probably have a shifted navel." He took me to a man in town who took my hand, said Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim, and with one touch — it was gone. Then they put a copper ring over your big toe to bring things back into alignment. That man passed away in 1982, but the treatment worked. It's the simple life — and it was beautiful, man.

We didn't have fans. We didn't have air conditioning. We had a clay pot — a matka — from which everyone in the dormitory would come and drink cool water. That was it. And one time in an ithikaf, we actually all got sick because we weren't used to a fan being on. We had never had a fan in school.

When I went back in 2011, Allahu Akbar — it looked like Harvard University. Totally changed. Now you have wealthy people, engineers, and technologists sending their children there. huffaz and ulama coming out. This is a real change. It takes time for things to happen. But the struggle was worth it.

Remembering the State of Islam in America

And now look at the state of Islam in America today. I remember when in New York City there were no more than eight masajid. In Brooklyn, there was only one — State Street Masjid. In Manhattan, one or two. Malcolm X's masjid was one of them. In Staten Island, I remember our jamaat being there in the wintertime, making wudu from a fire hydrant in the cold. There were Albanian brothers building a masjid but not praying in it — constructing a beautiful structure but not praying. Nobody would have imagined that right here in America, under the nose of kufr, this deen would come to life like this. Allahu Akbar.

He is the One who sent His Messenger with guidance and the religion of truth to make it prevail over all religions — even if the mushrikun detest it.

This is an inspiring environment. You see so many elders, children becoming huffaz and ulama, holding it down right here in America. Don't become despairing. And don't become disparate. I'm so happy that the Mawlana asked me to come here — because it's a beautiful thing.

The Responsibility of Men — A Final Reminder

You brothers — you are a fountain for tomorrow. I know Rabi'ah ibn Ka'b was 13 years old and was considered a man by the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam — ready for marriage and for responsibility. Islam builds men. Islam builds men's sense of responsibility. A qawwam also means responsible — responsible for himself, for his family, for his deen.

And Allah described those men who truly followed the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam:

Men who are not distracted from the remembrance of Allah by trade or commerce. Responsible. And the first responsibility is the deen. How can I love my Allah? How can I love my Rasul? That is the responsibility that will make you responsible in everything else.

All you young brothers and men — Allah chose you. This is not a coincidence. Everyone here has potential. Allah wants to use us. Just a little effort, a little bit — don't freak out, don't get frustrated — make the effort, and Allah will use us. This whole gathering — this is not a joke. This is a potential for Allah to bring out the truth right under the nose of kufr:

Closing Announcements

Jazakumullah khair. SubhanAllah — the sacrifice that Shaykh Zubair made, you just heard bits and pieces of it. Allahu Akbar. Allah has made things so easy for us today, really. Clean bathrooms, clean everything. Now all we have to do is come in — study a little bit, put in a little effort. The biggest sacrifice today is not one pound of meat for 200 people — it's to leave your phone. The mujahada of today is to stay away from haram, especially watching haram. If you can protect yourself from watching haram, alhamdulillah, insha'Allah you can become a wali of Allah.

Brothers, please look up SalamGuard — salamguard.com. Protecting your family and devices from harmful content is essential in today's digital age. Whether you're using Android, iPhone, PC, or Mac, with the press of a button you can block over 60,000 of the most harmful sites. The site also has a section on adhkar and ruqya — Qur'anic verses to recite to help break addiction. Block your sites and read the adhkar listed there, and insha'Allah within one week, Allah will give you freedom from this life of slavery to one's desires.

The Futuwwa book is available in the lobby — please get a copy before you leave. You can also order it from Imam Ghazali Institute at imamghazali.org or from Mecca Books — it's cheaper there than Amazon. Don't give Jeff Bezos five extra dollars.

For the alumni of the Tanweer program — your alumni gathering with Mufti Minhaj and the other teachers is in the Dar-ul-Salam banquet hall. There are snacks and the program has already begun. After the du'a, please make your way there insha'Allah.

Shaykh Zubair will be here tomorrow as well — if you want to speak with him or receive his du'as, please do so tomorrow before or after Dhuhr. Let him rest tonight, as he has been with us all day without rest. Please meet him tomorrow insha'Allah.

Closing Du'a