Make your Final Moments Memorable | Mufti Abdul Rahman Waheed | Pearls of Faith 2024

Opening — Quranic Verse and Hadith

(Reported by al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2512)

(Reported by al-Bayhaqi in Shu'ab al-Iman; also referenced in al-Tabarani)

The Most Important Question

My dear brothers and sisters, it doesn't matter where we are on our journey towards Allah. Some of us may be entering into the fold of Islam, some of us may be practicing Muslims, some of us may be very far along — the Shaykh who just spoke before me with a beautiful voice — it doesn't matter where we are on this journey. The most important question that should be on the minds of every single person along this journey — this question should always be present on our minds at all times — and if from this conference we are confident enough to start asking this question, not even answering this question, just start asking this question, I believe this conference is a successful conference for all of us.

This question has to be: What will it be like when Malakul Mawt comes to take my soul? In those final moments, what will my state be?

We plan so much and prepare so much to live, but we forget to prepare in the manner we are going to die. And that's what people before us did.

This is the way Allah speaks about it.

Allah doesn't say أَمَرَ — أَمَرَ means command. وَوَصَّى means وَصِيَّة — meaning when someone is leaving this world, they give you that last will. It's from mercy, and you want to take the responsibility to fulfill that. It's not just a command, an order — أَمَرَ. No, it's وَصَّى. It's love.

Prepare for those last moments before you leave this world. Every single Sahabi, they prepared, they planned their death — literally they were planning their death, saying: I want to die like this.

Examples of Those Who Planned Their Deaths

The people of Gaza today are showing us husn al-khatimah — individually and collectively. All of them, whether you see a child, whether you see a mother, whether you see a sister, whether you see a community of people — we are all confident knowing that they all died a good death. Are we confident that I will die a good death? Because Allah is not going to judge us by the way we live — it is but the state that we die in that Allah will judge us by.

The Sahabi Umar ibn al-Khattab is asking and begging Allah — he's planning his death. You know how we buy a house and we plan: the plants are going to be here, the curtains are going to be like this, the windows are going to be like this? He's planning his death: "Oh Allah, I want to die as a Shaheed, and I also want to die in the city of your Habib." Shaheed and Habib — he wanted both of them.

One of my father's friends used to pray for 40 years — he prayed Fajr and Isha in Masjid Nabawi. He used to say Salaam to the Prophet ﷺ every morning and every evening. I asked him, "What du'a do you make?" He said, "I make du'a every single day: Oh Allah, let me be buried next to a Sahabi in Baqi'." Planning where his grave is. Where do you want your grave to be? Where do I want my soul to be taken? How do I want to be in that moment when my soul is taken from my body? Planning that for 40 years. He passed away a few years ago and he is buried right next to Halima Sa'diya.

My teacher, his name is Suleyman Benori. His teacher's name is Yusuf. His father's name is Yusuf Benori. His father's name is Sheikh Adam Benori. These are from Ahle Bayt. Sheikh Adam Benori — his family came from Medina to Baghdad, to Afghanistan, and they settled in a place called Benor in Punjab in India. Sheikh Adam Benori used to make du'a all his life: "Oh Allah, I want to be buried at the feet of Uthman bin Affan. I want to be buried at the feet of Uthman bin Affan. Oh Allah, I want to be buried there."

History cannot be denied. Facts cannot be denied, brothers and sisters. When he passed away — this young man, a very simple man who did not even have money for Hajj — someone gave him money for Hajj. He got on a boat from India, came to the Hijaz, went to Medina, died in Medina, and was buried at the feet of Uthman bin Affan.

Their last moments — when they said: "Fuztu wa Rabb al-Ka'bah! Fuztu wa Rabb al-Ka'bah!" — "By the Lord of the Ka'bah, I am successful!" When Ali ibn Abi Talib gets out of his house, waking people up for Fajr Salah, he turns around and he sees a man standing there with a dagger, and he stabs him. He doesn't run away, he's not crying. He's saying: "Oh Allah, I'm successful!"

The Story of Abu Darda and the Longing for a Good Death

Abu Darda says something so interesting. He says: Imagine yourself being in Medina, and you see a person's body being placed in front of the Prophet ﷺ, and the Prophet comes out of his house and performs Janazah. Then this person's body is carried to Baqi', and the Prophet is carrying this person's body. Then this person's body is placed in the grave, and the Prophet ﷺ is sitting next to the grave.

Abu Darda says: What do you think was on the minds of every single person who witnessed this? Every single person who witnessed the Prophet performing Janazah, carrying the Janazah to the grave, sitting next to the grave, placing the body in the grave — everybody was thinking the same thing:

"Oh, I wish I was in that place. Oh, I wish I was that person." Oh, I wish I was in Gaza and became shaheed today. Oh, I wish I could have been in the hospital and done something today. This is what they were thinking.

The Story of Abdullah ibn Mas'ud at Tabuk

Abdullah ibn Mas'ud says: In the night of Tabuk, I went to guard the tent of the Prophet ﷺ. I get to the tent and he's not there. So I get very anxious, I run around looking for where the Prophet ﷺ is. I see a light from a far distance, so I start running towards the light. He says: As I get closer, I see two men sitting on top of what looks like a grave.

He said: SubhanAllah, I get closer, and I see the Prophet ﷺ in the grave, holding a person's body and hugging this person, and saying: "Oh Allah, I love him, so You love him. Oh Allah, he pleased me, so You please him."

And he said: I'm looking at this person, and the Prophet is in the grave with him, placing him in the grave. The last thing this person's body touched was the body of the Prophet ﷺ. And I look on top of the grave — Abu Bakr and Umar are both on top of the grave, helping the Prophet ﷺ. I see these three great men burying this shaheed, who became a shaheed at night.

Abdullah ibn Mas'ud says: Wallahi, as soon as I saw it, I started crying. I said: Oh Allah, I wish I was that deceased — that Abu Bakr and Umar are on top of the grave, the Prophet is inside the grave, and I'm shaheed in Tabuk. I wish I was that person.

So this is the question that we all have to be asking ourselves and preparing for: What's going to happen to me in those last moments?

The Importance of a Good Death for Your Family

Today I'll leave you with three tips. If you and I follow these three prophetic tips, then I am confident that we will not die in any condition in which we're not proud of and confident of. I am confident of that.

Trust me — my youngest brother, Abdul Rahim, passed away two or three years ago. Having a good death, it makes it so comforting for your family. Nobody wants to associate with somebody who had a very bad death — a death in which they're partying, or a death in which they're overdosed on drugs. May Allah protect all of us — say Ameen — and our children.

If someone told you, standing in front of you today: "Abdul Rahman Waheed was in Medina praying Salah in Rawdah and he passed away in Sajdah" — SubhanAllah — you would be like, "Yeah, you know what? I remember that person." You would be proud to associate with somebody who had a good death.

In our families, we have people who had a good death — my grandmother, my grandfather passed away on the 27th night of Ramadan — we speak about it for the rest of our life. And those who don't have that type of death, we kind of just move on.

So if you want to make it easy for your loved ones to move on after you leave from this world — have a good death. Those who are picking up their children in Gaza right now — trust me, my father, when he was told that his son passed away, he was told by a person from Palestine, and he told my father:

"Wallahi, I'm not sure — should I congratulate you, or should I pay my condolences to you? You are the father of a shaheed. You're the father of a hafidh of Quran. You're the father of a person who studied 7 years and became a scholar, and he passed away after teaching Quran while in the service of his mother, in an accident — he's a shaheed. I'm not sure if I should congratulate you or should I give you condolences."

This is the sentiment being passed around in Gaza at the moment: "SubhanAllah, you're the father of a shaheed, the mother of a shaheed."

Three Tips for a Beautiful Death

Tip One: Stop Any Act You Would Be Ashamed of When Death Arrives

I'll start with a Tabi'i. His name is Abu Hazim — his son's name is Abdul Aziz, and his own name was Salama ibn Dinar — a great Tabi'i. His son Abdul Aziz passed away on the night of Jumu'ah, praying Tahajjud in Masjid Nabawi in Rawdah, and he passed away in the last sajdah. This is his father, Abu Hazim. He used to say:

Anything that you would not feel comfortable doing while dying — stop doing it today. Anything. Stop asking the question "Shaykh, is this halal or haram, is this okay or not?" No. Ask yourself: Are you comfortable doing this while dying? If the answer is yes, then continue doing it. If the answer is no, then start the process of stopping. You can't stop right away — I understand that — but start the process. Begin that process of stopping.

I'll give you an example. Are you okay if death comes to you and you're not talking to your parents? You shouldn't be okay with that. Because, my brother, it's the loved ones — the blood relatives — who arrange the funeral, who do the Janazah, who bury them. And then they're the ones who stay there the most. When you're sitting at the cemetery, 99% of the people who are visiting those who are in the graves are blood relatives. Are you okay that you're not talking to your parents and you pass away in that state? You shouldn't be okay with that. It's not worth it.

Are you okay that you're having a fight with your sibling — your brother or your sister — and then you pass away like that? Wallahi, I remember in COVID, one of the most difficult situations to be put in is to speak to someone who lost their husband or wife or child right after a fight they had between each other. The wife and the husband — this happened multiple times. May Allah protect our relationships, say Ameen. They had a small argument, the husband left, got into an accident. Now the wife is regretting the fact that she had this argument.

I was in New Zealand right after the massacre in Christchurch. Three days later I was there, for four days. Wallahi al-'Adheem — the two people who were the most difficult to give condolences to, to comfort:

One was a person who was praying Salah in Jumu'ah. There was a person praying next to him, and as soon as this person heard a shooter coming to the masjid, this person broke his Salah, jumped out of the window to survive — while the person next to him kept his hands tied in Salah, just grabbed his son, to be honored to be shaheed with his son. He did not break his Salah. This person's family, when we went to their house, they were serving us sweets, because they were so happy: "My son and my grandson — on one day, on the day of Jumu'ah, while praying Jumu'ah — were shaheeds. What an honor!" While the person who jumped out of the window has survivor's guilt now: "Why didn't I stay? Look at all the shuhadā' — I could have been one of them." So to give that person comfort was so difficult.

And the other person who was difficult to give comfort to — a brother who just got into a fight. It's not worth it. The beef isn't worth it. Wallahi, I'll tell you — it's not worth it. Nothing is perfect in this world. Nobody is perfect in this world. No situation is perfect in this world. Our job is to just be survivors. Be survivors. We have to survive this world.

We're not people of dunya trying to make it to Jannah. We are people of Jannah surviving dunya. There is a huge difference. Why are we confused? The people in Gaza are people of Jannah surviving dunya.

So what happens now? In the mode of survival, you just eat whatever you can eat, you help whoever you can help. You don't get involved with "Oh, I gotta go have fun over there, do this, do that" — because you have a survival mindset. We just gotta survive this dunya and just get to Akhira. That's it.

A brother who drove up to the masjid — I had to give him condolences. Him and his brother just got into a fight outside the masjid because the brother was telling him, "Just come to the masjid" — it was just something ridiculous. He told me the story. His brother leaves the car, he goes to park. By the time he comes to the masjid, the shooter was leaving. His brother was shaheed.

Any situation, any state, any act that you won't be proud of doing when death comes — stop it right now.

Tip Two: Progress Every Single Day in Good Deeds

The second thing is a statement of a Sahabi. Hasan ibn Ali, may Allah be pleased with them both. He used to say:

I'll translate it a little differently to make you understand. He says: The greatest loser on this earth is the one whose two days are equal in terms of good deeds.

You can profit. This year can be better. You can live in a bigger house, a better house. But the greatest loser, according to him in this statement, is the one whose two days — in terms of good deeds — are equal.

I'll give you an example. Thirty years ago, our parents came from a different country and they were living in a studio apartment — my father and mother with five kids in a studio apartment — and my father is becoming a doctor. Twenty-five years later, things look much different. All of his children have their own homes, they're driving their own cars, even his kids are becoming doctors.

The question now is: if I try to compare my life today to what it was five years ago — five years ago I was a senior in high school, someone asked me "What are you doing?" I'm a senior in high school. Five years later, I'm in the first year of medical school. So much has changed in five years. Has your sajdah changed in five years? If I compare my sajdah that I just performed in Asr today to the sajdah I prayed five years ago — would it be the same, or is it a little bit different? Have I learned any more du'as in five years? Has my knowledge of Allah increased? Has my Tajweed gotten better? Think of small things — even if we learned one du'a a year, I would have learned more du'as by today.

So true gain and benefit is for the one who starts thinking that every day has to be better. Because the Prophet ﷺ used to make du'a:

"Oh Allah, make every single day of mine better, until the last day of my life is the best day of my life."

This is actually the nature of a human being — we like new things, we like progression. That's okay. Wallahi, I'm not telling you to stop. Use that same mindset with good deeds. Just like you won't be okay with wearing the same dress at two weddings — don't be okay with having the exact same night of Laylatul Qadr two straight years. It should be different. This year should be far better than last year. These ten days of Dhul Hijjah should be far better than the last ten days of Dhul Hijjah of last year.

But why is it so that if you ask someone who's married — the best days of their marriage are their first days? But a person who is close to Allah — Wallahi al-'Adheem — the last few days, the moments they're living in, are the best few days.

So the second tip is: progress every single day — increase, increase, increase. And inshallah, the last day of our life will be the best day of our life.

Tip Three: Do Everything As If It Is the Last Time

I'll conclude with the last tip from the Prophet ﷺ. This is a beautiful statement. When someone asked him for advice and said "Make it concise," the last advice he gave was:

(Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 4171)

"When you stand for Salah, stand as if this is your final prayer." What does that mean actually? Ibn Hajar says this hadith is not restricted only to Salah. Have the mindset — and now I'm going to tell you what it means — anything that you're doing in your life: prepare your mind to believe that this potentially could be the last time you're doing this.

You're sitting in front of me right now, you're sitting at this conference. What happens to us is we know — inshallah, there are more conferences coming — but if you start thinking that this potentially could be your last time listening to a talk, you would listen differently.

Have you ever seen — may Allah protect us — I've seen in my life, a father or mother being told by the doctor: "Sir, you can now walk into your son's hospital room and pay your last rights to him, because he's in stage 4 cancer — we're going to pull the plug." The father and mother walk in. Tell me the truth — do you think the father is on his phone? Do you think the mother is on their phone? Do you think they're having a conversation like the way we do at a dinner table — with our loved ones, not our enemies, with our loved ones — sitting at a dinner table, looking at our phones? We're so present but at the same time still so absent, because we are taking this encounter for granted — that we'll have it again.

But if you believe that this — not possibly, but very well could be — the last time you're sitting with that person, you will sit with that person differently. It could be the last time you sit next to your husband or your wife. If your loved ones are sitting next to you, look at them properly. You never know.

And I'll tell you something. People say your first impression is your last impression. I, based on my brother's life, say: your last impression is your lasting impression. Because people remember what they did last with you when someone leaves this world.

The Story of Abdul Rahim

My brother, Abdul Rahim — and I'm going to finish with this. I was at my mother's house, and I was leaving from my mother's room to the front entrance. I walked in from the garage. My youngest brother noticed that I forgot — I had walked in from the garage and my shoes were in the garage. So he ran to the garage, picked up my shoes, and ran to me before I got to the front door of my mother's house. He was 22 years old.

As soon as I got to my mother's entrance, I realized my shoes weren't there. At that same moment, he lowered himself and put the shoes down next to my feet. I put my arm around him and I said: "Abdul Rahim, you're a Shaykh now. You do not need to do this anymore." He said to me: "You're still my older brother."

Brothers and sisters, I never saw him again. He passed away the next morning.

Your last impression is your lasting impression. That's what lasts in your heart — him saying to me "You're still my older brother," him serving me in those last moments. That's what's going to actually last in people's memories.

The Story of the Prayer in Rawdah

My student — I don't like to share names, but I'll say his name — his name is Yunib. I was with him in Masjid Nabawi. He'd never been there before. He comes there — I'm standing here, he's standing here — and right next to him is the Hujrat of the Prophet, so we're right next to the gate of the Prophet where his grave is. He gets there and he's told that whatever du'a you make in Rawdah will be accepted.

You know what he does? He raises his hands: "Oh Allah! Oh Allah! Oh Allah! I want to die in this prayer. Oh Allah, take my soul in this prayer."

And I'm next to him. I said, "Bro, chill — yo, chill!" You know why? I'm married to his sister. I wasn't going to go back home. I was like, "Bro, chill!" But I didn't say anything to him. He prayed Salah. He's still alive, guys — by the way, unfortunately he's still around, I still gotta deal with him.

He finished his prayer and I said SubhanAllah. I went to the hotel and he's upset. He said: "I thought all my duas were going to be accepted. I made du'a to die — why am I still alive?" So I had to go through the whole explanation of how your du'a can be accepted in many different ways — that one you hear all the time. I had to go through it, make him comfortable.

After I went through the whole thing and made him comfortable, I asked him a question. I said: "Yunib, please tell me about that prayer." Because he believed that was his last prayer. He told me: "Mufti Sahib, every time I moved in ruku', I thought I was going to die. I got up, I thought I was going to die." He said: "Mufti Sahib, that was the best prayer of my life."

Conclusion

Brothers and sisters, the third tip is: do everything as if this is your last time doing it. Because if you do it in that manner, inshallah, that will be a great, great way to leave this world.

May Allah give us a great death in husn al-khatimah. Jazakallah khair.