The Concept of Patience - Shaykh Ahsan Hanif

The Concept of Patience

إِنَّ الْحَمْدَ لِلَّهِ تَعَالَى نَحْمَدُهُ وَنَسْتَعِينُهُ وَنَسْتَغْفِرُهُ وَنَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ مِنْ شُرُورِ أَنْفُسِنَا وَمِنْ سَيِّئَاتِ أَعْمَالِنَا مَنْ يَهْدِهِ اللَّهُ فَلَا مُضِلَّ لَهُ وَمَنْ يُضْلِلْ فَلَا هَادِيَ لَهُ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا عَبْدُهُ وَرَسُولُهُ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ وَسَلَّمَ تَسْلِيمًا كَثِيرًا

أَمَّا بَعْدُ، فَإِنَّ أَصْدَقَ الْحَدِيثِ كِتَابُ اللَّهِ تَعَالَى وَخَيْرَ الْهَدْيِ هَدْيُ مُحَمَّدٍ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ وَشَرَّ الْأُمُورِ مُحْدَثَاتُهَا وَكُلَّ مُحْدَثَةٍ بِدْعَةٌ وَكُلَّ بِدْعَةٍ ضَلَالَةٌ وَكُلَّ ضَلَالَةٍ فِي النَّارِ

The Final Verse of Surah Āl-'Imrān

The last verse of Surah Āl-'Imrān is a command from Allah in which He commands us to have patience — not only once, but twice; not only in one form, but in two forms. This verse comes at the end of a passage — the final ten or so verses of this surah — a passage that our Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ would often repeat and recite.

As is mentioned in the hadith of 'Ā'ishah رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا, collected in the Sahih of Ibn Hibbān, the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ one day spent the whole night in salah, and as he was praying and reciting the Quran, he was crying. He continued to cry in his standing, in his rukū', and his sujūd until it was nearly the time of Fajr. Bilāl رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ came to call the Prophet to come and lead the salah for the companions, and he saw how much he had been crying. So he said, "O Messenger of Allah, do you do this when Allah has forgiven you for your past sins and your future sins?" He replied صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ, "Should I not be a grateful, thankful slave to Allah?" Then he said, "Indeed, tonight verses were revealed upon me — woe to those who read them and don't contemplate or ponder over them." Then he recited these verses — the final passage of Surah Āl-'Imrān.

It is also collected in al-Bukhāri and Muslim — the hadith of Ibn 'Abbās رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُمَا — that he said he spent the night with the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ and his aunt Maymūnah رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا — Maymūnah was one of the wives of the Prophet and the maternal aunt of Ibn 'Abbās. He said he was waiting for the Prophet during the night to get up to pray, because he wanted to pray qiyām with him and see how he prays during the night. He said the Prophet woke up and the first thing that he did was recite these final verses of Surah Āl-'Imrān.

So there were times when he صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ would focus on these verses, and they have many lessons, many benefits, and they consist of a number of du'ās. But what I want to focus on is the final verse of this surah in which Allah gives the command:

"O you who believe, be people of patience and people who have collective patience, and be firm upon that, and fear Allah that you may be successful."

The Centrality of Patience in a Muslim's Life

This issue of patience is mentioned throughout the Quran in many, many ways. It is repeated again and again and again because of how integral it is in the life of a Muslim. Every one of us needs patience — you need it every single day of your life. You need patience in your job, in your career, in your business. You need patience with your family — with your wife or husband, with your children. You need patience in your worship, that worship which you perform for the sake of Allah. And you need patience with all of the interactions and dealings that you often have. How many times a day is patience required — and it is required in different contexts and for different reasons.

That is why it is mentioned in that way throughout the Quran. It is mentioned with four different wordings — two of them in this verse and two elsewhere in the Quran and the Sunnah — to show you that patience comes in different forms and in different levels, because not every situation is the same, and so therefore the type and level of patience required is not going to be the same. The believer is the one who is astute enough, knowledgeable enough, wise enough, and smart enough to know which one goes where.

Because that's how life is — it throws its challenges your way, its problems, its hardships, its calamities, its trials — and you need to know how to deal with them with one of the greatest weapons that Allah has given to you, and that is patience.

That is where it is reported that Imam Ahmad رَحِمَهُ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى said patience is mentioned in the Quran over 90 times — 90 times — and it is wājib, an obligation. Every Muslim needs patience; it's an obligation upon you. And that's because Imān comes down to these two things: half of it is patience and half of it is shukr — gratitude to Allah. And he took that from the hadith of the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ in Sahih Muslim:

(Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2999)

"How amazing is the affair of the believer — all of his affair is good." Then the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ went on to mention how our life generally is divided into two states: either it is some type of happiness, so you are grateful to Allah, or it is some type of hardship, and so you have to display a level of patience.

The Four Types of Patience

The First Type: Sabr — Patient Endurance

The Quran speaks about patience and tells you how to be patient in many different ways. The word sabr comes in the Quran many, many times — sometimes in the form of a command: be patient with what Allah has decreed, be patient with the command and the decree of Allah, because often things happen to us and we don't expect them.

The very concept of patience is how to deal with the unexpected. It's not when you know what's going to happen and you've prepared yourself and you're expecting it. True patience is when a calamity strikes and it's unexpected — how will you respond? How will you behave? How are you going to speak? What are the actions that you're going to perform as a result of that situation?

Like the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ when he came across the woman who had lost someone dearly beloved to her — a close family relative. So she was wailing and crying, upset as any one of us would be, but she was going overboard in the manner of her grief, in the way that she was expressing it. So the Prophet said to her, "Be patient." But she was so overcome with her grief, so struck in her calamity, that she didn't realise who it was. So she said, "Leave me alone! What do you know of what I'm going through?" — which is also a very natural response that many people have in those types of situations. So the Prophet left her and walked on.

The people around her said, "Don't you know that was Allah's messenger? You just spoke to the Prophet!" And then she realised. So she chased him, she ran after him, and she said, "O Messenger of Allah, I didn't know it was you." He said صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ, "True patience is when calamity first strikes."

So when you see something, experience something, hear something — even if it doesn't affect you directly but indirectly — something which is going to bring you some sadness, some grief, some suffering: how are you going to respond? Not to be someone who just responds emotionally or reactively in a way that goes against the teachings of the Quran and the Sunnah, but to know how to manage that situation, how to respond in a way with knowledge, intelligence, and wisdom — that is sabr.

Throughout the Quran you are told to be patient, and that is why Allah praises the people of patience and says glad tidings are for the patient — those who, when calamity strikes them, the first thing that comes to their mind, the first thing you hear from their lips, is:

"To Allah we belong, and to Him we shall return."

Patience is needed in many different ways and forms. That is why Allah says those who display patience, Allah will give them their full reward without accounting. Allah loves the people of patience. Allah is with the people of patience.

The Second Type: At-Tasabbur — Practising and Training Oneself to Be Patient

Sometimes patience can come easier in a situation than in others. Sometimes it's easier to be patient because the situation is not such a big deal — it doesn't affect you so much. Maybe when your young child comes and does something that irritates you, you can display patience because in the grand scheme of things it's not something which is going to cause you a great deal of ache.

But in other situations, displaying patience becomes much more difficult, because now it affects you in a way that is deeply painful. Someone comes and they take from you, or they strike you, or they do something that they shouldn't have done — and so now it's going to be something which requires you to have even more discipline, to be even stronger, to suppress some of the anger.

As the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ said when he asked the companions, "Who from amongst you is the strongest?" They said, "O Messenger of Allah, the one that can out-wrestle another, the one that can pin someone else down, is the stronger one." He said, "No. It's the one that can suppress his anger, suppress his rage in times of anger."

That's a form of patience that you display in that situation. In the Sharī'ah or in the Arabic language, sometimes this is referred to as at-tasabbur — that you actually have to train and remind yourself: I need to be patient at this time. And that is not an easy thing to do, because usually it is something to do with your emotions — either to do with something that you love or something that you are extremely sad or grief-stricken over. It is going to play with your emotions — anger, love, hate — and so now you have to be even more disciplined in the way that you respond.

The Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ — and I want to mention this because it is an important issue that applies to all of us every single day, but especially in those things that you don't have control over — for the last two years in Gaza, things have happened and they have changed over the period of time. We ask Allah today, on this day of Jumu'ah, in this blessed gathering, in this masjid, that Allah brings relief to our brothers and sisters, that Allah makes their affairs easy for them, and that Allah grants them protection in their life, their wealth, and their families.

You have to be patient sometimes with things that you have no control over. In the hadith of Khabbāb ibn al-Aratt رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ in Sahih al-Bukhāri, when the Muslims were being persecuted in Mecca, being tortured, and some were put to death for their beliefs, Khabbāb came and said, "O Messenger of Allah, why don't you make du'ā' for us? Why doesn't Allah's help come? Why doesn't Allah's aid descend upon us?" And the Prophet told him صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: "You people are hasty. You don't have patience. You have to be patient." Because sometimes you don't have the ability to control — and that type of patience is harder because it is something which will play with your emotions more so than something that doesn't irritate or annoy you as much.

Those companions came from the Ansār to the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ — in the hadith of Abu Sa'īd رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ — because the Prophet had received money and wealth. So they came and asked him from that money. He gave to them. They asked a second time; he gave to them. They asked a third time; he gave to them. Then they asked for more, but he had nothing left. So the Prophet said to them, "Any good that comes to me — any money or wealth, anything that I have — I will never keep it from you; I will share it with you." Then he said:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 1469; Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1053)

"Whosoever is content with what Allah has given them and abstains, then Allah will make them more content. And whoever seeks to be self-sufficient, Allah will make them more self-sufficient. And whoever practises patience, Allah will give to them patience."

Because money and wealth is one of those things that — if someone comes and takes from you, or if someone has it and you don't, or if you think that someone has taken from your rights — it's going to play with you in a way that can sometimes be very harmful. So the Prophet used the word يَتَصَبَّرْ — you have to practise that type of patience.

People differ in terms of their personalities, their character, and their tolerance levels. For some it comes easier and for some it comes harder. So you have to train yourself to be patient. As the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ said — or as some of the scholars used to say:

(Reported by al-Khatīb al-Baghdādī in al-Jāmi', and attributed to various scholars of the Salaf)

"Knowledge comes through learning, and forbearance and patience come through the practice of it." You have to train yourself to be in that way.

The Third Type: Musābarah — Collective and Mutual Patience

The third way in which it is mentioned is the one that Allah then also speaks about in the verse I recited — the final verse of Surah Āl-'Imrān: اصْبِرُوا وَصَابِرُوا — "be people of patience" individually, and "people of collective, mutual patience." This is when there are other people involved in the issue. You have an issue with someone, so you have to be patient and they have to be patient as well. It takes two of you in that occasion to be patient; both of you have to show self-discipline.

And that often occurs in relationships and dealings that we have — you with your wife, you with your children, you with your parents, you with those people closest to you, you with your business partners. If you're a teacher, then with your students — they have to be patient with you and you have to be patient with them.

So Allah is saying that you as believers should be patient as individuals, but you also have to be patient collectively. Right here, sitting in the masjid — sometimes you come for Jumu'ah, as you're coming in, as you're leaving, as you're praying next to your fellow Muslims — sometimes people will do things that annoy you, things perhaps that are even wrong and that they shouldn't be doing. But you have to display some patience, some understanding, some gentleness. اصْبِرُوا وَصَابِرُوا — that is what Allah commands.

The Fourth Type: Al-Istibār — Patience Until It Becomes Your Character

The fourth and final type of patience is that if you do that over and over again, it will become the norm for you — al-istibār. It becomes part of your character because you practise it so much, in so many situations, that when the occasion does occur that is completely unexpected, or is something which is a major calamity that befalls you — like what happened to that woman in the story of the Prophet صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ — you know how to deal with it. From the very beginning you know to praise Allah, to thank Allah, to turn back to Allah, and to only do what Allah has legislated.

And Allah commands us in the Quran in a particular context:

"Be from those who command your families to perform the salah and then practise patience upon this" — meaning, make it the norm.

Because when you and your families — when we have children or we have our spouses — sometimes they don't pray, they forget, they delay the salah, or they just get distracted. You have to remind them. Every single prayer, every single day — for Fajr, you have to wake up your children. You can't just take a day off. You can't just say, "Today I'm busy, I'm tired." Every single day it is your responsibility, until it becomes the norm. Every morning you don't have to think about it twice; it's not something you even have to compute. It's just the norm: I wake up for Fajr, I pray, and then I wake up my family and ensure that they wake up and pray as well. وَاصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْهَا.

That's a different type of patience. But if you do that the first day, the second day, one week, two weeks — it's difficult. It takes time. Sometimes it's annoying. Sometimes they don't wake up. Sometimes you're tired. So many different things. But if you do it day in, day out, week in, week out, month in, month out — it becomes the norm. Everyone knows that they're just going to remind each other to pray. And likewise for many other deeds and actions of worship.

These are the four contexts in which sabr is mentioned: to be patient individually, to practise patience, to be patient with one another, and then to be patient and do it so much that it becomes the norm for you. We ask Allah that He makes us from the people of patience and that He gives us the reward of the patient.

بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لِي وَلَكُمْ فِي الْقُرْآنِ وَالسُّنَّةِ وَنَفَعَنِي وَإِيَّاكُمْ بِمَا فِيهِمَا مِنَ الْآيَاتِ وَالْحِكْمَةِ أَقُولُ قَوْلِي هَذَا وَأَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ لِي وَلَكُمْ وَلِجَمِيعِ الْمُسْلِمِينَ مِنْ كُلِّ ذَنْبٍ فَاسْتَغْفِرُوهُ إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحِيمُ

Second Khutbah

بِسْمِ اللَّهِ وَالْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ وَالصَّلَاةُ وَالسَّلَامُ عَلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ وَمَنْ وَالَاهُ وَسَلَّمَ تَسْلِيمًا كَثِيرًا أَمَّا بَعْدُ

Ribāt — Guarding the Heart with Resolve

The final verse of Surah Āl-'Imrān then concludes with two more commands. Allah says وَرَابِطُوا — to be firm and to have resolve upon this. Because patience is something which requires resolve from you.

Ibn al-Qayyim said that this word ribāt is often used in the books of fiqh to speak about those people who are fighting on the frontier lands — they're in the fortresses on the frontier borders. Those people are making a ribāt because they have to protect the borders of a country, so they're sometimes in the most dangerous of positions.

Allah uses it here, though, in the context of your heart. Allah tells you to be people of patience, and Allah says you have to show that type of defensive measure on these types of issues. You can't just lower your guard. You can't just sleep. You can't just miss your post that you're meant to be guarding. You have to be there every single day. Because the moment you let your guard down, Shaytan is in. Iblīs comes to you, and there is that one time that you are not mindful, that you're distracted, that you don't remember — and Shaytan will come and he will make you do something, more often than not something that we will regret.

So then Allah says what will help you in all of this is the remembrance of Allah, to be mindful of Allah, to be conscious of Allah. For the people of worship, the people of dhikr, the people of Quran, and the people of du'ā' — always have the name of Allah upon their tongue. The remembrance of Allah is never far from them. And because it is never far from them, they are more likely to remind themselves to be patient, and to remember the virtues of patience, the rewards of patience, and the standing of the people of patience in the sight of their Lord.

Closing Du'ā'

May Allah bless us and our families, and may Allah shower His mercy and forgiveness upon us, and may Allah place upon us what gives us steadfastness in our religion. May Allah grant us understanding of this religion and comprehension, and then to act in accordance with that.

May Allah make easy for our brothers and sisters across the world their affairs, and may Allah shower upon them His forgiveness and mercy, and may Allah place upon them His divine aid and protection.