The Enduring Power Of Love And Its Sacrifices

Opening Praise and Introduction

الحمد لله، الحمد لله رب العالمين، والصلاة والسلام على سيد الأنبياء والمرسلين، وعلى آله وصحبه أجمعين. أما بعد،

قال الله تبارك وتعالى في كتابه المجيد، بعد أعوذ بالله من الشيطان الرجيم، بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم:

وقال النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 15; Sahih Muslim, Book 1, Hadith 69)

صدق الله المولى العظيم، وصدق رسوله النبي الكريم، ونحن على ذلك من الشاهدين، والحمد لله رب العالمين.

The Unmatched Power of Love

There probably is not any force in this universe among human beings that is stronger than love. It is a force to be reckoned with. At times, when a person falls in love with someone or something, they become madly in love — they are not able to think straight anymore. They are always and constantly preoccupied with the thought of their beloved. They are ready to sacrifice anything and everything. They don't care what type of difficulty, what type of pain they have to endure. But because that love has settled in their heart — it has now taken root in their heart — no one can shake it anymore. No one can shake that love anymore.

The Love of a Mother for Her Child

We often give the example among our relationships — we give the example of the mother with her child. This is one of those relationships. The kind of love that a mother has for her child — no matter what happens, no matter what difficulty the mother has to go through, she endures it for the sake of the child. In the middle of the night, the child cries. He wakes up once, twice — no problem. Who's up? Mom's up. Mom's up, taking care of the child, feeding the child. The child says, "I want this" — she's giving it to the child. Early morning, the child wakes up again. She didn't get her sleep, but still — she's up. She's tired, she hasn't eaten well, but she goes through all of that. She endures all of that. Why? Because this is her child.

Someone tells her, "This child is a source of discomfort for you. You're not able to sleep well, you're losing sleep, you're not able to eat well — get rid of him." She'll say, "No, what are you talking about? This is a piece of me. This child is a piece of me. How can you tell me to get rid of it?" It may look like this child is a source of discomfort for me, it may look like this child is a source of frustration for me — and perhaps at times it could be — but the love that the mother has for the child, she will never be ready to give the child up.

This is the example that we always hear — the parents' love for the children. The children may not be able to display the same type of love and affection to their parents the way the parents have displayed. And most individuals won't even realize, won't even realize the sacrifices that a person's parents have made — until they have their own children. Then they will still not be able to appreciate it fully. Why? Because they're so consumed within their own children that they won't even be able to take the time. They'll have moments of realization — maybe, "Oh, I can't imagine what my father must have gone through. I can't imagine what my mother has gone through." But still, what can we say? It's our own misfortune that we're not able to show and do for our parents what they deserve, the right that they actually have on us. Allah grant us the tawfiq.

The Three Ways of Dealing with Others: Zulm, Adl, and Ihsan

There are children, subhanAllah, who go beyond — they go beyond what we normally see today. Of course, it can never fulfill the right of the parent, ever. One of our teachers used to tell us in class, he said it is interesting that in the ayah of the Quran where Allah speaks about parents, Allah says:

That you do ihsan with your parents. He would say: look, when it comes to dealing with people, there are three ways you could deal with them — either you do zulm, either you do adl, or either you do ihsan.

Zulm is: someone does something and instead you violate their right, you abuse their right — this is zulm.

Adl is tit for tat. The person does something, a favor for you, gives you something — you do the exact same thing back. Exact same, whether it's good or whether it's bad. He punched you — you punch him back equally, that's adl. He gave you a gift — you gave him the same gift, that's adl. He spent this much money on you — you spent that much money on him, this is adl.

Then there is a third, which is ihsan. Ihsan is that the person does something — whether it's good or it's bad, whether it's right or whether it's wrong — but you treat the person better. You do better. So even if he abused, even if he violated your right, you say, "I forgive him. I'm not going to do that, I'm not going to take revenge." That's ihsan. He does good towards you — you say, "I'm going to go above and beyond."

Allah didn't say — of course, zulm is out of the question. Allah didn't allow zulm. Allah even prohibited zulm on Himself. Allah doesn't do zulm Himself:

Indeed, Allah does not do zulm on the people. This is important to recognize — because on the Day of Judgment, when the disbeliever goes into Hell, when he goes into Jahannam and he gets that punishment, خَالِدِينَ فِيهَا أَبَدًا — that is Allah's adl being demonstrated, not Allah's zulm. Allah doesn't do zulm. Allah doesn't oppress.

So Allah, of course, zulm is out of the question. But Allah also didn't say وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ عَدْلًا — that you do justice with your parents, just as they were with you, you be with them. No. Allah said إِحْسَانًا — you do ihsan with your parents. Because forget about adl — there is no way you could do adl. How are you going to do adl with your parents?

You say, "Let me calculate the amount of money my parents spent on me. OK, over the span of 18 years they spent this many millions of dollars on me — OK, I'll pay them back the millions of dollars." You think that's adl? What about the nights that they spent awake? What about the nights that you disturbed them when you were a child? The pain that they may have endured because of you — how are you going to do adl for that? There is no adl for that.

And then even the dollar that they spent on you — I tell you, if a person were to say, "I'm going to calculate the money and I'm going to pay them back" — the dollar that they spent on you, the nature and the intention and the ikhlas that they spent it with — you won't spend that same dollar with that same intention, with that same sincerity. You won't. You're just simply giving it. Why? Because you're trying to make up for it. Whereas they spent it out of love for you. You can't pay them back. There is a mahabba there.

The Danger of Misplaced Love

The point is this: the kind of mahabba that parents have for their children is unlike any type of mahabba. It makes a person do all kinds of things. And that's why Allah reminds the people that your wealth and your children could be a test for you:

They could be a test for you. Why? Because of your love for them, you may violate the law of Allah, the right of Allah. Out of my love for my son, out of my love for my daughter, I am now going to disobey Allah and the command of Allah. That's why it's a test for you. Your wives, your spouses — أَزْوَاجُكُمْ — sometimes it happens: out of our love for our spouse, what do we do? We end up violating the laws of Allah.

That's why Allah says — a true believer has intense love for Allah:

He will not let the love of anyone or anything supersede the love of Allah. And the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, said:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 15; Sahih Muslim, Book 1, Hadith 69)

None of you has truly believed until he loves me more than he loves his son, more than he loves his father, more than he loves anyone. Only when you have that intense love for Allah will you be able to focus and not allow other attachments to violate the laws of Allah. When the hukm of Allah comes — you have to pray — you're not going to look at whether you're able to do it or not. That love for Allah will prompt you to do it.

When the Love of Dunya Overpowers Us

We can't wake up for tahajjud — forget tahajjud, we can't wake up for Fajr salah. We have difficulty waking up for Fajr salah. But when our child says something, we're up. The child needs something — we're up.

I give this example — we see this all the time during Black Friday when there are sales. You see all kinds of ajaib, all kinds of karamat happening. A person would be willing to wake up at 3am, 4am, stand in line in the cold for hours. Why? Because they're getting a good deal. Somebody once told me about how they stood in line in that exact scenario — but we can't wake up for Fajr.

We have the love, the mahabba of this material wealth so rooted in our heart that we're not ready to sacrifice anything. Our own takabbur, our own pride, our own arrogance does not allow us to submit. If we're wrong — Allah gives a command: pray. Difficult. But when it comes to a job — if you have to wake up at 5am for it — you'll be up. You'll be up for it.

At night, if you have to pray Isha — very difficult, especially in the summer months when Isha is so late. Taraweeh — Taraweeh is about to come — 20 rakats in the masjid — difficult! Oh, but I have work. You have to work till 12am? No problem! You have the last shift, the night shift? No problem, we'll do it. The mahabba for the dunya is so ingrained and so rooted within us that we cannot sacrifice anything for its sake. There's money coming in, there's arrogance, there's pride — we feel something with it — we're not ready to sacrifice anything.

The Seeds We Plant in Our Children's Hearts

I say the same thing when it comes to the upbringing of our children. We are ready for our children to listen and watch Disney movies and learn Disney songs. But when it comes to the Quran — they have no idea. And we pride ourselves: "MashAllah, look, my son can sing this song!" But Surah al-Fatihah? Doesn't know it. Why? Because we have mahabba for those things.

And then when somebody stops us, we say — "The question is, is this halal or is this haram?" Wrong question! It's not about whether it's halal or haram. It's about what kind of seeds you are putting and instilling in the heart of your child. There is a trajectory. The seeds that you instill in your child's heart will bloom, they will flourish. If it's the seeds of iman, then that iman will strengthen as the child grows older. And if it's the seeds of mahabba of the dunya — that's what is going to grow in their heart.

In the beginning, these are the types of questions we ask: "What's wrong with this? Is this halal? Is this haram? Can you please show me a fatwa for this?" But just like a seed — you put it in the ground, it just comes up as a little small stem with a little flower, easily uprooted. You say, "This is nothing, this is not a problem." Then 10 years go by. 20 years go by. And that same seed — the mahabba of the dunya, the mahabba of kufr — grows in a person's heart. And now they're 25, now they're 30. And now, subhanAllah, their heart is attracted to kufr, their heart is attracted to all of these things. And then we sit worried — "What happened?"

Allah protect us. We're all on the same boat — it's just a reminder. There's a trajectory that goes. Allah gives the same example in the Quran regarding iman:

When the seeds of iman are sown — you tell your child, "Do you know about Allah?" You talk to the child about Allah. We don't think about it — in our household, do we have ta'lim? Do we sit and talk? Maybe read a hadith, talk about Allah? We'll talk about everything else, but do we sit and talk about this?

You ask your child: "Who created the heavens?" — Allah. "Who created the earth?" — Allah. "Who created you?" — Allah. "Who gave you the food that you're eating?" — Allah. If you teach that to the child and he grows up with this mindset — what's going to happen? He's going to grow up and Allah is going to be in his heart. But that's our job as parents. We have to do it. And we have to change ourselves as well. How can we expect our children to develop that when we ourselves haven't developed it — the mahabba for it?

Why the Khutbas Are Not Affecting Us

So now a month of Ramadan comes. Most khutaba, most khutaba — what do they do? Month of Ramadan comes, we talk about Ramadan. And that was my plan. But subhanAllah — how many times have we not heard khutbas regarding Ramadan? Every year. Next week we still have one more week — you'll hear khutbas regarding Ramadan. Eid comes — you'll hear khutbas regarding Eid. Hajj comes — you'll hear khutbas about Hajj. Muharram comes, the new year comes — you'll hear a khutba. But why is it not affecting us?

Is it because we're not letting it? We are so distracted. These things are numbing us — numbing our brains, numbing our minds, numbing our hearts. We are so distracted by so many things. How is it going to affect us then? So at the end of the day we have to push ourselves. Develop that love.

Two Ways to Develop the Love of Allah

I'll finish with two things — two of the easiest ways to develop the love of Allah.

First: Surround yourself with the right environment. These masajid, these madaris, these marākiz — these are centers of iman. The more you frequent these places, the more you frequent people who talk about Allah — what is going to happen? It is going to rub off on you. If not today, if not tomorrow — one day.

Second: The dhikr of Allah. Be regular, be consistent. Take some time out during the day. Recitation of the Quran, the tasbih, the hamd. In the hadith — in Sahih al-Bukhari — the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, mentioned:

(Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 6682; Sahih Muslim, Book 48, Hadith 37)

There are two words — two statements — that are so beloved to Allah. They are very easy on the tongue but very heavy on the scales: سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ، سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ الْعَظِيمِ.

So we regularly say سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ، سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ الْعَظِيمِ. Don't just say it — think about it. SubhanAllah means what? "Ya Allah, You are free of every imperfection. Any and every imperfection that could be there — Ya Allah, You are free of it." SubhanAllah. When you say alhamdulillah — what are you saying? You are saying, "Ya Allah, any quality of perfection that could be there — that is within You, Ya Allah. All praise be to You. Ya Allah, You are perfect." SubhanAllah, walhamdulillah.

Closing Du'a

Allah grant us tawfiq. This month of Ramadan is coming — Allah allow us to take full benefit from it. Allow us to develop that mahabba. When that mahabba develops in our heart, we will not prefer anything or anyone over Allah and His Rasul. وَآخِرُ دَعْوَانَا أَنِ الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ رَبِّ الْعَالَمِينَ.

Announcements

Please pass the donation boxes from left to right — donate generously.

No curb parking — please do not park on the curbs behind the seminary building or the swift highway. We have additional parking space in the used car lot.

Jumu'ah Salah time will be changing from Friday, March 17th. Jumu'ah Salah timing will be as follows: the first prayer — the English talk will start at 1:00pm and the Iqama will be at 1:30pm. The second prayer — the English talk will start at 2:10pm and the Iqama will be at 2:40pm.

There are dates for sale outside at the back.

There is a special event — a meet and greet with former Pakistani cricket player Saeed Anwar on March 13th after Maghrib here at Darul Salam.

We have a monthly seminar on the fiqh of fasting — the rulings related to it, advice, and Q&A to make the most of the month of Ramadan — on Friday, March 17th after Maghrib.

We have our weekly program on Saturday. Team Fajr will be tomorrow — Iqama is at 5:45am.

Tuesday's Tafseer program continues with Surah al-Mu'minun after Isha prayer, on Tuesdays.

Weekly Salawat gathering on Thursdays.

There is a grand opening of the Islamic Center of Aurora (ICA) — Masjid Hidayah. Please join the grand opening on Friday, March 10th. Isha is at 8:00pm at the Islamic Center of Aurora. Flyers are being distributed outside.

There is a du'a request for Sister Atifah Mayman — she is in critical condition from a stroke. May Allah grant her sihah and 'afiyah. Likewise to all the Muslims and believers wherever they may be — may Allah grant them sihah and 'afiyah. And whoever has passed away, may Allah grant them His mercy.

If everybody can please move up — if there is any gap in front, please fill that. There are a lot of people standing in the back. Please stand up and fill any gap that is there, and move forward.